Candle of love and hope for my friends.

A lot is going on right now and I’ve not had much time to write. I had a birthday this week and it got me ruminating. Here’s some of what I’ve learned in my 40 years. (Some of these say “you,” but they all mean “me.”)

1. clean something every day, even if it’s only your hands

2. read to your kids; it is food for life

3. mothering well is largely a matter of knowing what things to get excited about, and what not to

4. wine is wonderful

5. smiling makes you feel good and it’s free (sometimes I forget this one)

6. make a place for butterflies and birds in your world; you won’t be sorry

7. stuff is only stuff; it all wears out eventually

8. beware of modeling beeswax in the laundry

9. tell your story, but don’t get so caught up in telling it that you forget to live the next chapter

10. children are resilient; however, test this only with careful discrimination

11. make your own meaning, don’t swallow anyone else’s

12. read poetry; read everything

13. when you fuck up, breathe, and then start over

14. being married to your best friend is ideal

15. try new things every day

16. exercise is good for me even if I don’t like it

17. fashion is stupid—occasionally fun, but stupid

18. it feels good to help people

19. somehow, time can both fly and drag—at the same time

20. words can indeed hurt

21. onions and Brussels sprouts are actually delicious

22. sing more, dance more

23. be your own beautiful freaky self out loud; if you don’t you’re cheating everyone

24. avoid the pink aisle and boys need dolls

25. sometimes the best course of action is to set it on fire

26. vote

27. gardening is cheaper than therapy

28. feminism benefits everyone

29. art is important, and more important to make than to consume

30. boys are actually sweeter than they want you to think they are

31. love and kindness is all the religion I need

32. equality for only some is no equality at all

33. find your cause; better yet, find a dozen of them and get to work

34. miracles are everywhere and often go by the names of “humanity” and “nature,” “life” and “science”; as such, they are no less miraculous

35. making it often feels better than buying it

36. I cannot “do all the things”; nor should I try to

37. a whole lot of things that bother me today won’t matter a bit tomorrow, so I should just chill

38. I am still learning

39. friendship is as necessary to me as air

40. my ultimate career goal is still philanthropist

Last month, my son’s fourth grade class put on their spring play, The Theft of Thor’s Hammer. It was a funny story and the children performed beautifully in two performances. I only have photos from the performance in which Lucas played Thor. Doesn’t he look mighty? I was so proud to see him try for a big part—the part he really wanted—and get it. He’s never put himself out there like that before. And boy did he! I think this part required quite a lot of courage. You’ll see why in a minute.

Here’s Freya, the goddess associated with love, beauty, fertility, gold (and sorcery, war, and death—don’t mess with Freya).

And here’s glorious Frey, with Thor’s wife Sif, an earth goddess whose hair is “like golden sheaves of wheat,” in the background.

See Thor’s grumbly, angry face? That’s ACTING. I love it. I also love the wool roving used for his hair and beard.

This darling child played Loki with such athleticism and feeling. Truly it was a joy to watch Loki’s antics.

Loki borrows Freya’s falcon feather cloak.

In the play, the giant Thrym steals Thor’s hammer, Mjolnir. The Asir gods are imperiled if Thor doesn’t get it back. Thrym says he’ll return the hammer to Thor if Freya will consent to become his wife.

Several of the of Norse gods say this isn’t a bad plan. Freya, on the other hand, is highly insulted. She will not consent! (Go Freya!)

Thrym insists and waits eagerly for his bride.

Loki suggests that Thor disguise himself as Freya to go get the hammer. This is not Thor’s favorite idea, but after his fury subsides, he reluctantly agrees.

Thor and Loki are dressed as Freya and her maid. The veil hides Thor’s manly visage.

At Thrym’s home, the giants bumble about and sing a song. Thor-as-Freya is invited to a wedding feast, where he puts away a lot of food before unveiling his true god-self and bonking Thrym with the hammer. Mustn’t fight giants on an empty stomach, after all.

With Mjolnir back in Thor’s possession, the world of the Asir gods is saved. Odin and the others are grateful.

Are you hoping to make a special Mother’s Day gift for mother or grandma, or perhaps an end-of-year gift for a teacher? This yarn necklace is easily made by children who have a little finger knitting experience, in fact, my son made one for me when he was in the first grade and recently taught me how to make it. This kind of cord-making is called “finger knitting” and “finger weaving.” (Besides necklaces, you can make scarfs, braceletes, belts, or headbands in this way.)

Materials

• wool or cotton yarn in a pretty color

Start by placing the tail of your yarn in the crook between your thumb and forefinger so that the tail hangs down over the back of your hand. Use your thumb to pinch the tail and hold it in place. Take the ball end of your yarn under and over, under and over your four fingers, wrap it once around the pinkie finger.

Continue weaving the working yarn under and over, under and over, traveling back toward your index finger.

Wrap the yarn around your index finger and go under and over, under and over until you go around your pinkie again, and then weave it back toward your index finger in the same manner. Wrap the yarn one more time around your index finger and let the ball end rest across your palm. You should now have two loops (horizontal bands) of yarn on the front of each finger as you see in the photo below.

Now, beginning with your pinkie finger, grasp the lower loop with the fingers of your other hand and lift the lower loop over the upper loop …

… and completely off the pinkie finger as in the next photo below.

Now release the loop. Your hand should now look like this photo below, with two loops on the first three fingers and only one on the pinkie finger.

This action of moving the bottom loop over the top loop and off the finger is finger weaving. You will repeat this action with the remaining three fingers (ring finger, then middle finger, then index finger).

As before, with the ring finger, lift the bottom loop up and over the top loop, and then off the finger altogether. As you complete this procedure with each finger, you’ll see that you now have only one loop left on the finger.

When you reach the index finger, the yarn tail that your thumb has been holding in place acts as your bottom loop. Treat it as any other loop and lift it up and over the top loop and off the index finger.

The tail will now trail down between your index finger and your middle finger.

Now grasp your working yarn and wind it under and over your fingers as you did before, under and over, and around your pinkie finger so that your new loops are above the loops already on your fingers. Then continue winding the yarn under and over, under and over until you’re back to your index finger again. You should now have two loops on each finger again.

The loops are now high up on your fingers. Push the loops down to the base of your fingers. Then, as you did before and starting with your pinkie finger, pull the bottom loop up and over the top loop and let it go. Repeat for all four fingers exactly as you did before.

Push your stitches down again. Weave your yarn again, under and over, under and over, around, under and over, under and over above the loops already on your fingers, until you have two loops on each finger again.

As you repeat this process of pulling bottom loops over top loops again and again, row after row, you will begin to see the woven cord coming off the back of your middle and ring fingers, as in the photo below.

The woven cord looks kind of flat at first, but when you’re done and you tug it gently a few times, it will become a round cord for your necklace.

When your cord is long enough, it’s time to cast off. (Experiment with the length by putting it around your own neck while it’s still on your fingers. If you can see the necklace when you look down, chances are good the cord is long enough and stretchy enough to easily fit over a head.)

To cast off, begin with only one row of loops and don’t weave new loops above them.

Instead, lift the loop on the pinkie finger off the finger and place it on your ring finger. Your ring finger now has two loops and your pinkie has none, as in the photo below.

Lift the bottom loop over the top loop and release. Now your ring finger has only one loop. Pick up that loop and move it off your ring finger and place it on your middle finger, which now has two loops. Lift the bottom loop up and over and release. Now move the remaining loop on the middle finger to your index finger. Lift the bottom loop over the top loop and release. Now your index finger has only one loop and your other fingers are bare. You may now remove the final loop from your hand, cut your yarn, pull the working yarn through it, and pull it tight. Now pull the tail on the other end of your cord tight.

Now gently tug on your cord so that it becomes round rather than flat. Tie the two ends together, making a circle necklace.

The necklace should be stretchy enough that it can easily go over head of the lucky person you give it to. She will treasure it more than she would any chain of gold.

Happy Mother’s Day!

(This tutorial was originally published in the Little Acorn Learning May Enrichment Guide. Check out all their many wonderful offerings at Little Acorn Learning.

I am thoroughly enjoying my garden this year. Everywhere I turn I see successes in the form of bright flowers. Not everything I’ve planted has done well, but so much has and I am finding that going even a few days without some time working in the garden is too long. (It helps when the weather is so completely perfect like it is now.)

Of course, there are spots of ugliness that I have plans to change, but I’ll give a little tour of the good stuff. My foxgloves (above) are off the hook this year. In fact, since this photo was taken, more tall spires have bloomed out and they’re bending down to the ground. I’ve got to stake them up with something.

These sunny fellows are called Sun Roses (Helianthemum nummularium, according to the Interwebz). It’s a low-growing ground cover with orange flowers that drift up above.

April is the month for Azaleas and mine are doing great. I’ve actually been feeding them this year. I’ve turned over a new leaf and vowed to support the plants I already have with loving attention and fertilizer.

This vine is new this spring. It’s a form of rudbekia called Black-eyed Susan vine. I’ve had it for about three weeks and it’s still blooming like this. My hope is that it will grow up onto my fence near my patio. My concern is that my soil isn’t all that great in that spot. It was such an arresting flower that I decided to take the chance. I think I paid $12 for this. It stands about 4 feet tall.

My nemesia from last year is blooming beautifully.

I think this rose is called “Peace” but I’m not sure. I think it’s heavenly.

My clematis vine survived the winter and bloomed like crazy all through April. Then it had a few quiet days before a new batch of flowers opened up. These are about six inches across. I bought a pretty trellis for them to climb and need to paint it and get it into its permanent spot soon for the vine to grow on.

Peppermint candy rose—it was called something like that, but I forget. This rose was new last year and it seems very happy.

I bought a Mandevilla vine at Costco. My mother says she has killed several of these over the years. I figured I’d give it a try. It’s flowers look like ballerinas.

And this baby is Ian’s favorite rose “Hot Cocoa.” We like it so much we have two of them.

Let’s see … the delphinium is looking good and getting ready to bloom. I have seven new irises that I recently bought at the nearby Horton Iris Farm. One called “Obi-Wan Kenobi” is blooming and another called “Tomorrow’s Child” will bloom soon. Today I planted a scarlet dianthus and three purple verbena ground cover plants. The rock roses I put in last year are blooming and I’m looking forward to them getting bigger; they should get at least three feet tall. My evening primrose has spread and is now sporting baby-pink poppy-like flowers. I’m hoping it will spread out more in the front yard too. All the purple iris rhizomes I bought from the Waldorf school farm are doing fine but aren’t yet ready to bloom. I think I’ll have to wait until next spring for them to be well enough established to flower.

Oh—and the mint is trying to take over the world.

My next project, apart from putting in tomatoes and peppers and pumpkins from seed, is to get some rooting hormone and try my hand at propagating from cuttings.

Good Morning, Mistress and Master,

I wish you a happy day;

Please to smell my garland

‘Cause it’s the First of May.

A branch of May I have brought you,

And at your door I stand;

It is but a sprout, but it’s well budded out,

The work of Nature’s hand.

—from A Child’s Seasonal Treasury

Happy May Day! Today is one of my favorite days of the year because May Day celebrations are so beautiful and full of flowers and because it is my older son’s birthday. This year feels extra special because Lucas is turning 10. A decade of our lives has been spent loving and raising this beautiful boy.

He is magnificent and I love him so!