If you have a sanguine temperament, you probably never even think about optimism, or being optimistic—you just are upbeat most of the time. Not everyone is naturally optimistic, though. As caregivers and parents, optimism can be one of our most valuable personal resources. Finding ways to cultivate optimism in our lives is highly rewarding and will provide a fount of energy and love that we can draw from, especially when times get tough or we’re having a challenging day.

But what is optimism? Some would say it is hope, or the expectation that the future will bring good things. Some would define optimism as a tendency to think of life and the event unfolding around us in a positive light, to see opportunity in change, to see good outcomes when we imagine what is to come.

There is a well-documented connection between optimism and good health—and the converse. The mind-body connection is being validated by scientific research, and has long been understood in many cultures. The Latin word optimum means “best.” So how will you be your best self, live your best, do your best, and reap the best outcomes for your efforts?

Even if it’s not your tendency to be optimistic, you can cultivate optimism in your life for your own benefit and the benefit of those around you. Patterns of optimistic thinking can be learned. Here are some things you can do to nurture an optimistic outlook. I know because this is something I work on all the time.

Get some exercise. Exercise has so many benefits, which we’ve all heard before. But the positive impact of exercise on your emotional and mental state is just exactly what you need to be optimistic. Not only does exercise provide you with a boost to your physical energy and emotional well-being, it’s also a way of investing today in your healthy, happy future. You want to be around to enjoy those grandchildren and great-grandchildren, to fulfill your life goals, and exercise is the ticket.

Plant a tree. By planting a tree, you are symbolically looking to the future. You plan where it will go in your garden, imagine its height and breadth as it grows, how it will cast shade, and even perhaps that you will someday picnic under its canopy. What else will your tree bring you and your family? How else might it bring you joy? As you watch your tree grow, you have a symbol of your optimism.

Practice “prenostalgia.” OK. My husband and I made up that word, but I think it works. By prenostalgia I mean imagining a moment in the future when you might look back and fondly remember this time in the present. I guess that’s a kind of funny way of saying be mindful of this moment, and take some steps to ensure that you can enjoy it later, too. Take up scrapbooking, for example, or journaling, or blogging. If you‘re a shutterbug like me, realize that every photo you snap is a simple act of optimism. You are investing in your future enjoyment of life, just as much as you’re enjoying the present.

Prepare a time capsule, or a hope chest, for your children. Add to your time capsule, little by little, through the years. It can contain artworks, special items of clothing, and other mementos. A hope chest traditionally is a collection of things that a grown child will need when she or he reaches adulthood. Exercise your imagination. What will your child like to have in the future?

Make a handmade quilt. There’s nothing quite like a quilt as a symbol of love, warmth, and home. Stitch by stitch, you can sew in your hopes for the future, for the world, and for your beloved family members. While you work, imagine how this quilt you are making will be used, who will use it, and how it will be treasured because it came from your hands and heart.

Save some money. I look on each dollar I save for my sons’ college education as an exercise in optimism. No matter how small the amount, saving money is a way of planning for a good future. Perhaps it’s savings for your children or your own retirement; perhaps it’s for a special family vacation or for your dream home. Whatever you save for, you are acting out of hope and it feels good.

Make a microloan. Sorry to mention money twice in a row, but I think this one is great. Microloans are tiny investments in people and small businesses, especially in developing nations. There are several reputable organizations that can match micro-investors with people who need small amounts of cash (sometimes as little as $25) to get a business off the ground, thereby increasing the safety and health of their families and communities. This small investment is an act of trust and optimism, a testament to our faith in human nature and good in the world. An individual does have the power to change lives for the better, which is a way of changing the world.

Find the positive. Take a moment to find the positives in every situation, especially in those that are seemingly bad or discouraging. This silver-lining thinking may require some deep soul-searching and some practice to make it a habit, but if you make a concerted effort to change your negative thoughts to positive ones, you‘ll be learning optimism.

Say it aloud. Whenever you are feeling good about the future or confidence in yourself or others, say so out loud. Not only will you be sharing compliments and your happy expectations with others, who will surely benefit from hearing it, but also you will benefit from hearing yourself being positive and hopeful. Furthermore, be aware of your inner self-talk and compliment yourself when you do something well, when you make the extra effort, when you give of yourself, when you act out of kindness. Positive affirmations can help cultivate an optimistic outlook on life.

These few simple things, practiced and perfected over time, may just alter the way you look at everything. Soon, your own eyes will sparkle with hope and excitement in just that same magical way your child’s eyes do.

Finally, be gentle with yourself. You already are optimistic, even if you don’t realize it. Here is the proof: By spending time caring for children, you are engaged in faithful, optimistic work every day, striving toward and cultivating a bright, beautiful future world.

(This article was originally published in the Little Acorn Learning June Enrichment Guide in 2011. Check out all their many wonderful offerings at Little Acorn Learning.

Sunlight is flooding
The widths of space
The son of the birds echoes
Through the realms of the air
The blessing of plants sprouts
From the being of the earth
And human souls lift themselves
In feelings of thankfulness
To the Spirits of the World.

—Rudolf Steiner

Happy Summer Solstice! Here is a little tea concoction I made and it was so yummy, we’ll definitely do this again:

• two green tea bags
• lemon slices, squeezed into the water
• lemon balm leaves
• sweetener of your choice

(Steep all day, strain, and then chill before drinking.)

We have had a marvelous day and I hope you have, too.

We made a giant summer sun mosaic cookie together. Here it is before baking. And here is the basic giant cookie recipe from Mel’s Kitchen Cafe. This kind of thing goes over really big with my children. Lucas made the face; Asher did the eyebrows and the sun rays around the outside. Since the boys got soooo excited about putting the Reese’s candies on top, I realize now that I didn’t need to put peanut butter chips into the dough.

We painted suns, inspired by my co-author and friend Eileen Straiton’s project in our Midsummer Festival E-Book. I think once they’re dry we’ll hang them.

Then we had a beautiful Solstice feast of shrimp tostadas and several fresh salads. I needed lots of circles and colors and fresh veggies in this meal. We even added in some nasturtiums from our garden. We had so much gorgeous food, I wished we had guests to share it with! This is one of my favorite things: Eating amazing California food outside in summertime, when the day has been hot but the evening delta breezes pick up just in time.

“Give me the splendid silent sun with all his beams full-dazzling.” —Walt Whitman

Also, today marks six months since our little dog Solstice came to our family. He followed our boys home on December 21 and hasn’t left our side since then. We love him so much, and we’re all grateful to have him.

Here’s to unexpected blessings that follow you home and take up residence in your heart.

Here’s to abundance of joy, nourishment, learning, and opportunity.

Here’s to family traditions carefully conceived and simply crafted.

Here’s to courage, doing good, and generosity.

Blessed Be.

It was a very full day, with kid-made cards, brunch at grandma and grandpa’s house, Ian’s amazing crepes, dogs and siblings, swimming, and then hosting grandpa and Mimi at our home for a dinner of Korean barbecue spare ribs, salads, and homemade vanilla ice cream. We celebrated GG’s birthday, too! The boys made great gifts for Daddy in clay camp this week, but sadly these items are not fired yet and he’ll have to wait a little while until they are finished.

We are so fortunate to have the best Daddy ever, and so many wonderful grandfathers in our lives!

Summer vacation is off to a good start! The school year ended at our Waldorf school with a beautiful ceremony for the graduating seniors and the symbolic moving of classrooms for the other grades. Lucas’s fourth grade packed up and moved to the fifth-grade classroom. On the last day, all the students lined up and shook the hands of all the teachers, who wished them a happy summer. It was a day full of celebration and a great exhalation. It felt like coming to the end of a favorite book—a little bittersweet. This year has been a marvelous journey for our whole family and we are so blessed to be where we are, who we are, and with these loving people around us.

A lot of heavy, heartbreaking things have been and are going on these days among our friends. This has lead me to need to circle the proverbial wagons a bit. I am looking for ways to take care of us, myself included, in the hopes that our hearts will mend. And frankly Band-Aid solutions are totally acceptable, such as an extra glass of wine for parents, or the impulse-buy ice-cream maker, or babysitting extra kids just so we can squeeze and giggle with a beautiful baby for a while.

Never underestimate the power of Baby Therapy.

I am also counting mercies, big and small:

• my son is loving swim team this summer
• my dog doesn’t chew on my kids’ toys
• my husband feeds us so well
• we have friends in the activities we’ve enrolled in
• my flowers bloom whether I feel happy or sad, and my hydrangeas are out of this world
• my new painting class starts this Thursday
• my little son is enjoying Clay Camp, even though he was afraid to try it at first
• we have received a dinner invitation for Friday
• I’ve had some time to visit some friends going through difficult times
• most of my cotton summer skirts still fit
• I’ve had time off from work this week to help us find a new rhythm
• my boys don’t have any cavities
• I got my Mother’s Day card from Lucas on the last day of school

And so we enter another summertime. Here we are again, bumping into each other—with love, (im)patience, and familiarity—trying to figure out once again how to spend long summer days together, while adapting to all the growth and changes we’ve all undergone since the last time. We’ll get the hang of it soon. Hello, summer!

I am delighted to announce that my dear friend Eileen Straiton (of Little Acorn Learning) and I wrote a Midsummer Festival E-Book! It has been a marvelous journey and I loved every step we took in making it. Please spread the word!

Little Acorn Learning
Monthly and Seasonal Guides
for Childcare, School and Home

*New* Midsummer Festival Book is Available!

This wonderful Midsummer Festival E-Book will bring the magic of summer into your home and help you keep celebrating throughout the season!  It is packed full of Waldorf songs, stories, verses, crafting tutorials and much more to help you celebrate Midsummer and the Summer Solstice with the children in your home, classroom, or childcare environment.

• Read Stories and Fairy Tales Filled with Sunshine to the Children
• Enjoy Verses, Songs, Poems and Fingerplays that Celebrate the Coming of Summer
  
• Learn about the History, Background and Symbolism of the Summer Solstice
  
• Get Ideas for How to Create Your Own Meaning of this Special Festival
  
• Enjoy a Solstice Feast
  
• Play Solstice Games
  
• Make a Midsummer Bonfire
  
• Create Simple Beeswax Suns with the Children
  
• Make a Solstice Wreath for the Birds
  
• Design Midsummer String Art Sunbursts
  
• Read a Story of The Sun Child and Create a Sun Child Necklace
  
• Craft a Shiny Garden Suncatcher
  
• Use a Rock Garden Sundial to Tell Time in Your Garden
  
• Make a Catch the Sun Throw Toy for Your Child
  
• Create a Paper Solstice Sun
  
• Read How to Create Daytime and Nightime Midsummer Magic
  
• Hang Summer Solstice Flags Indoors or Outdoors this Season
  
• Plant a Midsummer Indoor Herb Garden
• Craft a Sun Mosaic Birdbath
• Make a Sunshine Fairy out of Wool Roving and Felt
• Sew and Stuff Herbal Dream Pillows for St. John’s Eve
  
• Needle Felt a Summer Sun Wall Hanging
• Create Sweet Pocket Sun Sprites for the Children
  
• Bake Sun Bread with the Children
  
• Go on a Sun Hunt
  
• Make a Sun Mask
  
• Design a Sunshine Banner
  
• Crochet Sun Medallion Necklaces

In addition to our Midsummer Festival eBook, Little Acorn Learning has lots of wonderful offerings to fill your summer months with enriching, creative activities for your family, daycare, summer camp, or homeschool group, so please check out their other fine products.

A lot is going on right now and I’ve not had much time to write. I had a birthday this week and it got me ruminating. Here’s some of what I’ve learned in my 40 years. (Some of these say “you,” but they all mean “me.”)

1. clean something every day, even if it’s only your hands

2. read to your kids; it is food for life

3. mothering well is largely a matter of knowing what things to get excited about, and what not to

4. wine is wonderful

5. smiling makes you feel good and it’s free (sometimes I forget this one)

6. make a place for butterflies and birds in your world; you won’t be sorry

7. stuff is only stuff; it all wears out eventually

8. beware of modeling beeswax in the laundry

9. tell your story, but don’t get so caught up in telling it that you forget to live the next chapter

10. children are resilient; however, test this only with careful discrimination

11. make your own meaning, don’t swallow anyone else’s

12. read poetry; read everything

13. when you fuck up, breathe, and then start over

14. being married to your best friend is ideal

15. try new things every day

16. exercise is good for me even if I don’t like it

17. fashion is stupid—occasionally fun, but stupid

18. it feels good to help people

19. somehow, time can both fly and drag—at the same time

20. words can indeed hurt

21. onions and Brussels sprouts are actually delicious

22. sing more, dance more

23. be your own beautiful freaky self out loud; if you don’t you’re cheating everyone

24. avoid the pink aisle and boys need dolls

25. sometimes the best course of action is to set it on fire

26. vote

27. gardening is cheaper than therapy

28. feminism benefits everyone

29. art is important, and more important to make than to consume

30. boys are actually sweeter than they want you to think they are

31. love and kindness is all the religion I need

32. equality for only some is no equality at all

33. find your cause; better yet, find a dozen of them and get to work

34. miracles are everywhere and often go by the names of “humanity” and “nature,” “life” and “science”; as such, they are no less miraculous

35. making it often feels better than buying it

36. I cannot “do all the things”; nor should I try to

37. a whole lot of things that bother me today won’t matter a bit tomorrow, so I should just chill

38. I am still learning

39. friendship is as necessary to me as air

40. my ultimate career goal is still philanthropist

Last month, my son’s fourth grade class put on their spring play, The Theft of Thor’s Hammer. It was a funny story and the children performed beautifully in two performances. I only have photos from the performance in which Lucas played Thor. Doesn’t he look mighty? I was so proud to see him try for a big part—the part he really wanted—and get it. He’s never put himself out there like that before. And boy did he! I think this part required quite a lot of courage. You’ll see why in a minute.

Here’s Freya, the goddess associated with love, beauty, fertility, gold (and sorcery, war, and death—don’t mess with Freya).

And here’s glorious Frey, with Thor’s wife Sif, an earth goddess whose hair is “like golden sheaves of wheat,” in the background.

See Thor’s grumbly, angry face? That’s ACTING. I love it. I also love the wool roving used for his hair and beard.

This darling child played Loki with such athleticism and feeling. Truly it was a joy to watch Loki’s antics.

Loki borrows Freya’s falcon feather cloak.

In the play, the giant Thrym steals Thor’s hammer, Mjolnir. The Asir gods are imperiled if Thor doesn’t get it back. Thrym says he’ll return the hammer to Thor if Freya will consent to become his wife.

Several of the of Norse gods say this isn’t a bad plan. Freya, on the other hand, is highly insulted. She will not consent! (Go Freya!)

Thrym insists and waits eagerly for his bride.

Loki suggests that Thor disguise himself as Freya to go get the hammer. This is not Thor’s favorite idea, but after his fury subsides, he reluctantly agrees.

Thor and Loki are dressed as Freya and her maid. The veil hides Thor’s manly visage.

At Thrym’s home, the giants bumble about and sing a song. Thor-as-Freya is invited to a wedding feast, where he puts away a lot of food before unveiling his true god-self and bonking Thrym with the hammer. Mustn’t fight giants on an empty stomach, after all.

With Mjolnir back in Thor’s possession, the world of the Asir gods is saved. Odin and the others are grateful.

Are you hoping to make a special Mother’s Day gift for mother or grandma, or perhaps an end-of-year gift for a teacher? This yarn necklace is easily made by children who have a little finger knitting experience, in fact, my son made one for me when he was in the first grade and recently taught me how to make it. This kind of cord-making is called “finger knitting” and “finger weaving.” (Besides necklaces, you can make scarfs, braceletes, belts, or headbands in this way.)

Materials

• wool or cotton yarn in a pretty color

Start by placing the tail of your yarn in the crook between your thumb and forefinger so that the tail hangs down over the back of your hand. Use your thumb to pinch the tail and hold it in place. Take the ball end of your yarn under and over, under and over your four fingers, wrap it once around the pinkie finger.

Continue weaving the working yarn under and over, under and over, traveling back toward your index finger.

Wrap the yarn around your index finger and go under and over, under and over until you go around your pinkie again, and then weave it back toward your index finger in the same manner. Wrap the yarn one more time around your index finger and let the ball end rest across your palm. You should now have two loops (horizontal bands) of yarn on the front of each finger as you see in the photo below.

Now, beginning with your pinkie finger, grasp the lower loop with the fingers of your other hand and lift the lower loop over the upper loop …

… and completely off the pinkie finger as in the next photo below.

Now release the loop. Your hand should now look like this photo below, with two loops on the first three fingers and only one on the pinkie finger.

This action of moving the bottom loop over the top loop and off the finger is finger weaving. You will repeat this action with the remaining three fingers (ring finger, then middle finger, then index finger).

As before, with the ring finger, lift the bottom loop up and over the top loop, and then off the finger altogether. As you complete this procedure with each finger, you’ll see that you now have only one loop left on the finger.

When you reach the index finger, the yarn tail that your thumb has been holding in place acts as your bottom loop. Treat it as any other loop and lift it up and over the top loop and off the index finger.

The tail will now trail down between your index finger and your middle finger.

Now grasp your working yarn and wind it under and over your fingers as you did before, under and over, and around your pinkie finger so that your new loops are above the loops already on your fingers. Then continue winding the yarn under and over, under and over until you’re back to your index finger again. You should now have two loops on each finger again.

The loops are now high up on your fingers. Push the loops down to the base of your fingers. Then, as you did before and starting with your pinkie finger, pull the bottom loop up and over the top loop and let it go. Repeat for all four fingers exactly as you did before.

Push your stitches down again. Weave your yarn again, under and over, under and over, around, under and over, under and over above the loops already on your fingers, until you have two loops on each finger again.

As you repeat this process of pulling bottom loops over top loops again and again, row after row, you will begin to see the woven cord coming off the back of your middle and ring fingers, as in the photo below.

The woven cord looks kind of flat at first, but when you’re done and you tug it gently a few times, it will become a round cord for your necklace.

When your cord is long enough, it’s time to cast off. (Experiment with the length by putting it around your own neck while it’s still on your fingers. If you can see the necklace when you look down, chances are good the cord is long enough and stretchy enough to easily fit over a head.)

To cast off, begin with only one row of loops and don’t weave new loops above them.

Instead, lift the loop on the pinkie finger off the finger and place it on your ring finger. Your ring finger now has two loops and your pinkie has none, as in the photo below.

Lift the bottom loop over the top loop and release. Now your ring finger has only one loop. Pick up that loop and move it off your ring finger and place it on your middle finger, which now has two loops. Lift the bottom loop up and over and release. Now move the remaining loop on the middle finger to your index finger. Lift the bottom loop over the top loop and release. Now your index finger has only one loop and your other fingers are bare. You may now remove the final loop from your hand, cut your yarn, pull the working yarn through it, and pull it tight. Now pull the tail on the other end of your cord tight.

Now gently tug on your cord so that it becomes round rather than flat. Tie the two ends together, making a circle necklace.

The necklace should be stretchy enough that it can easily go over head of the lucky person you give it to. She will treasure it more than she would any chain of gold.

Happy Mother’s Day!

(This tutorial was originally published in the Little Acorn Learning May Enrichment Guide. Check out all their many wonderful offerings at Little Acorn Learning.

Good Morning, Mistress and Master,

I wish you a happy day;

Please to smell my garland

‘Cause it’s the First of May.

A branch of May I have brought you,

And at your door I stand;

It is but a sprout, but it’s well budded out,

The work of Nature’s hand.

—from A Child’s Seasonal Treasury

Happy May Day! Today is one of my favorite days of the year because May Day celebrations are so beautiful and full of flowers and because it is my older son’s birthday. This year feels extra special because Lucas is turning 10. A decade of our lives has been spent loving and raising this beautiful boy.

He is magnificent and I love him so!

I’m catching up from last weekend. Last Saturday we celebrated Delphinia, a tradition that we have held for about 20 years. Friends come from far and wide to play on the beach at Point Reyes National Seashore and to declare that springtime has come! The time for breathing out, adventuring, travel, enterprise, and busyness has returned and we can throw off our quiet introspection of the winter months. This year, the weather was absolutely perfect! We sometimes have a chilly beach experience, but not this year.

Champagne? Why, yes, thank you!

We picnicked. The daring children splashed in the cold waves.

We played and flew kites. Sweet X has a nifty dragon kite. We had a community fire; we shared our intention and our gratitude. Two mamas are expecting. We’ll soon have two new baby friends in the world! How amazing is that?

So many of us have dogs now and we brought them along. Five dogs makes things extra exciting. This was Solstice’s first trip to the beach—as far as we know. He’s new to our family.

The guys found a giant log up the beach. They decided it was in the wrong place.

And in the wrong orientation.

Then they hatched an even greater plan. (Everyone in this photo is at least 6 feet tall.)

And brave J climbed to the tipy-top, amply proving her courage, . I watched the whole thing and I still don’t know how she did it.

Point Reyes is so lovely. This is one of my favorite places on earth. Perhaps it’s because we have been coming here to celebrate and adventure my entire adult life. It’s pretty far from home—more than three hours in the car—but it’s definitely worth the trip. As is our family tradition, we picked up garbage on the beach before we left and hiked it out. Earth Day was the next day, after all, so we worked extra hard.

We didn’t leave the beach until 7:30 in the evening!

We were tired and soggy, but very happy. And our adventure didn’t end there! Our friends, T and E invited us to camp with them in their trailer at Samuel P. Taylor campground in the redwoods of Marin county. Staying overnight there with them meant that the fun didn’t have to end, we didn’t have to drive 3 hours home at night, and we got to play and hike a bit in the forest in the morning. It was sooooo great waking up on Earth Day to all that green!

It was beautiful. Suki dog patiently tolerated all of our noise and business. We had a yummy breakfast together.

I got to play with E’s iPhone and took this funky Hipstamatic shot of her and T.

And we got silly. Nothing pleases little boys more than allowing them time to be goofballs.

Thanks for the family photo, E! (And for all the photos!)

Naturally, I’d like to show you all the wildflowers and beautiful emerald trees but this post is getting waaaaaaaaaay too long …

Oops. They sneaked in here anyway. Ahem! So, I’ll skip our stop at the Mission San Rafael on the way home. Perhaps I’ll write about that another time.

For now, I need to clean my house and get ready to have family over for a birthday party this evening. Lucas turns 10 on Tuesday!