So, Ian and I have a date to go to a new restaurant owned by Mason Song, called Maritime Seafood and Grill, in Carmichael on Saturday  (http://www.sacbee.com/117/story/423116.html), so today, Valentine’s Day, isn’t the romantic, knock-your-cock-ring-off kind of day the diamond stores would have us think it is. (But don’t get me wrong—I got nothin’ against cock rings or diamonds!)

We have celebrated—but we did it with our kids. Late last night, I made a path of red, pink, and light pink paper hearts from Lucas’s bedroom to the kitchen table, and from our bedroom to the kitchen. I set out red placemats, a red candle, a Valentine’s balloon, and homemade Valentines at each place setting. I set out the heart-shaped egg molds, but forgot that we were out of eggs. No worries! Yogurt, chicken nuggets, and cereal for Lucas and quesadillas for us are a perfect way to celebrate Valentine’s Day!

When Lucas woke this morning, he came into our bedroom as usual and whispered, “Dad, there’s something special in the living room. Come see!” It wasn’t until the lights were on that he realized the paper hearts on the floor lead all the way to the kitchen. “Theres even a heart on my chair!” he said. We had a nice breakfast together, with only a moderate amount of “Get your clothes on!” and “No! My foot hurts!” drama. Five-year-olds are weird.

Today at school, Lucas enjoyed a Valentine’s Day party, complete with a story, a cookie, and a special dance. “Everyone fell down!” he said. “Even Miss Johnson! And Ripley, but I caught her. I saw that she was going to fall down so I went over and caught her.” (Lucas has a crush on Ripley, I think.)

He brought home Valentines that he made at school and a Valentine crown. He also brought out the Valentine that he made last week with grandma VoVo, which he’s kept hidden in his room, and gave it to us. They are all very cute and he was very proud of them. We talked about how on Valentine’s Day, we make sure that the people we love know we love them. 

EDIT: I forgot to mention that Ian went grocery shopping to buy a special (last-minute) dinner, too. Good thing he called home before he checked out! He brought home a beautiful bouquet of flowers to grace our dinner table.

I took the kids grocery shopping late this afternoon to buy supplies for a special (last-minute) dinner. I cooked London Broil with mushrooms and onions and salad. I bought big, fat (heart-like) strawberries and whipped up some cream for dipping. Ian made me two cosmos and then poured a lovely red wine with dinner. So, halfway through the meal I realized that I was totally tipsy and thoroughly enjoying myself. “Watch out, mom! If you have too many cosmos, you might get drunk and then you can’t drive a car!” Lucas informed me. I told him I wasn’t going anywhere. The strawberries and whipped cream after dinner were a big hit. We all laughed  a lot and even Asher ate two strawberries.

So, in the midst of our “normal” weeknight routine of dinner prep, cleanup, shower, stories, and bed, I ended up being drunk and goofy. Ian and I got romantic while Lucas showered and Asher (unbeknownst to us) splashed in the toilet. 

Oh. Shit! Not supposed to get frisky while the baby splashes in the toilet! That’s on the special Only Bad Parents Do These Things list. Ooops. Dammit, Ian, weren’t you supposed to buy those toilet locks?!

We moved on to stories (Days wth Frog and Toad) and cuddles for Lucas and drunk mama. We sang and snuggled and professed our undying, immeasurable love for one another. Asher crawled into Lucas’s room looking for me while we were cuddling—not something that usually happens.

So, now we get to try to coax Asher to sleep before Ian and I can make love. Hopefully, the baby will fall asleep before I do, but after several worrisome, sick-baby, wakeful nights, I’d say it’s now about even odds.

I promised I’d get permission before I posted this one, so we’ll see if Ian lets it pass.

Sometimes being a parent and a woman madly in love with her husband results in crossed wires and surreal nights. Oh. I think I hear Ian behind the bar shakin’ up another cosmo.
 

My baby is SICK! He developed a barky cough on Sunday during the night. Monday he was clearly sick and had a slight fever. Monday night and in the wee hours of this morning he was miserable, struggling to breathe, unable to sleep and crying without making much noise—just a hoarse, pathetic, croaking sound. The doctor’s office couldn’t see him until 3:30 today. His pulse-ox was pretty good—96. I hate the diagnoses where “supportive care” is about all anyone can do. They did give him a single-dose oral steroid, which I don’t much like but I know how awful not breathing feels and I want him to get whatever relief they can give. Otherwise, humid air is about all we can do for him. Poor baby is sad and clearly miserable. They said, “Keep him comfortable and happy.” Crying and agitation will make him feel and breathe worse. He is a far cry from happy.

http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/infections/bacterial_viral/croup.html
Signs and Symptoms

Croup is characterized by a loud cough that may sound like the barking of a seal and may be accompanied by fast or difficult breathing and sometimes a grunting noise or wheezing while breathing.

At first, a child may have cold symptoms like a stuffy or runny nose for a few days and may also have fever. As the upper airway (the lining of the windpipe and the voice box) becomes progressively inflamed and swollen, the child may become hoarse, with a harsh, barking cough.

If the upper airway becomes swollen to the point where it is partially blocked off, it becomes even more difficult for a child to breathe. This happens with severe croup. With severe croup, there may be a high-pitched or squeaking noise when breathing in (this is called stridor). A child will tend to breathe very fast, and the stomach or the skin between the child's ribs may seem to pull in during breathing. The child may also appear pale or bluish around the mouth because he is not getting enough oxygen.

Symptoms of croup often worsen at night and when the child is upset or crying. In addition to the effects on the upper airway, the infections that cause croup can result in inflammation further down the airway, including the bronchi (breathing tubes) and the lungs.

Contagiousness

Croup tends to occur in outbreaks in the winter and early spring when the viruses that usually cause it peak. Many children who come in contact with the viruses that cause croup will not get croup, but will instead have symptoms of a head cold.

Diagnosis

Doctors can usually diagnose croup by looking for the telltale barking cough and stridor, the squeaking sound on inhaling. They will also check the child for fever, cold symptoms (like a runny nose), or a recent viral illness, and ask questions to find out if the child has a prior history of croup or upper airway problems.

If the child's croup is severe and slow to respond to treatment, a neck X-ray may also be taken to rule out any other reasons for the breathing difficulty, such as a foreign object lodged in the throat or epiglottitis (an inflammation of the epiglottis, the flap of tissue that covers the windpipe). Typical findings on an X-ray if a child has croup includes the top of the airway narrowing to a point, which doctors call a steeple sign.

Treatment

Most, though not all, cases of viral croup are mild. Breathing in moist air seems to relieve many of the symptoms. Doctors will also sometimes treat with steroids, which helps with the airway swelling.

One way to humidify the air is with a cool-mist humidifier. Having your child breathe in the moist air through the mouth will sometimes break a croup attack. Or try running a hot shower to create a steam-filled bathroom where you can sit with your child for 10 minutes. Try cuddling and reading a bedtime story while doing this to help calm your child.

Sometimes, during cooler months, taking your child outside for a few minutes can help break the attack because the cool air can shrink the swollen tissues lining the airway. Parents can also try driving the child in the car with the windows down to bring in cool air.

If your child has croup, consider sleeping overnight in the same room to provide close observation. If you are not able to break your child's fast breathing and croupy cough, call your child's doctor or seek medical attention as soon as possible.

Medical professionals will need to evaluate your child if the croup appears serious or if there's any suspicion of airway blockage or bacterial infection. Medications such as epinephrine or corticosteroids may be given to reduce swelling in the upper airways. Oxygen may also be given, and sometimes a child with croup will remain in the hospital overnight for observation. As with most illnesses, rest and plenty of fluids are recommended.

Duration

The symptoms of croup generally peak 2 to 3 days after the symptoms of infection start. Croup resulting from viral infection usually lasts less than a week.

Complications

The vast majority of children recover from croup with no complications. Rarely, some children will develop complications such as ear infection or pneumonia.

Work at the magazine this week went well. I was brave and gracious. I talked to all my (ex-) coworkers about the changes at the magazine and my services as proofreader being discontinued. At least to my face everyone was sorry about it and regretful. The editor promises me that I’m the one they’ll call back when the economics are better. She referred to having me working on the magazine a “luxury.” Probably what will happen is that the in-house people will be asked to work more and harder. An editorial employee who is my friend also got cut: She still has a job, but they demoted her to receptionist (and canned the receptionist they had) and cut my friend’s pay. A few other people in different departments were affected (i.e., let go). They have also cut their freelance budget by what sounds to me like a big number, but given that I have no idea what the budget was or what it is now, it’s hard for me to say.

So, we’ll see. I guess they gotta do what they gotta do to stay healthy and weather the economic changes in the region. I must say though, it’s kind of ironic (correct word choice?) that I consistently read about all the wonderful, progressive, exciting things that are happening in this town in the pages of this magazine, which is presently reacting to an economic downturn. Anyway, Monday will be my last day there.

I’ve come to find the silver lining in this change: It’s kinda hard on Asher to have me leave him with a sitter or grandma for 3 to 4 days in a row, when the rest of the month he’s with me constantly. He has survived, of course, but by Friday evening, it was clear that he wanted and needed some mama time. Now I won’t have to do that anymore. I will still need babysitting, but I can arrange it on my own terms and hopefully establish a more consistent rhythm for him—one that he can actually get used to—that doesn’t have 27 days between sets of sitter days. As he is coming into The Great Separation Anxiety Stage, this will be easier on him.

Last Thursday, my father turned 62. That is hard to believe. In my mind, he is still 40. He probably will always be that age in my mind. A friend recently lost her father to cancer. He was older than my dad is—a doctor who practiced medicine up until his end. I can see how hard losing her last parent has been on her. Her plight has inspired some morbid thoughts.

I am thoroughly enjoying the drawing classes that Ian and I are taking on Thursday nights. The teacher is teaching in a loose, intuitive way, which sometimes works and sometimes doesn’t. But the true gift of the class is that we 1) leave our home and kids and assorted real-life distractions, 2) go to a studio/gallery where we are surrounded by art and things to draw, and 3) there are two and a half glorious hours with nothing else to do except drink tea. We are hoping to continue the classes for the next couple of months, or for as long as our babysitters are willing to watch our kidlings. Ian has really caught the bug. He’s been practicing at home, which is wonderful to see because while he’s drawing, he’s not worrying. I love this guy so much. I hate to see him worried. It has been very good for us to have this time together and share this artistic pursuit. I can’t wait to paint!

My brother and his girlfriend, Courtney, recently got back from a vacation in Mexico. It sounds like they had a super time. I think this is Jonathan’s first serious vacation in years. I’m happy for them both. I just love seeing them together and it is my sincerest hope that they continue to make each other happy.

We spent a lovely couple of hours with friends last night. It was refreshing and made me so happy to see them.

It’s amazing to me. Asher’s birthday is just two days away. I’m planning the food for his party on Sunday: we’re thinking sandwiches, chili and cornbread, salad, punch. I’m thinking of making an apple cake for the birthday cake, maybe with powdered sugar on top. Ice cream too, of course.

Yesterday Lucas and I decorated a beeswax candle with modeling beeswax. It’s a really lovely work of art now and it’s ready to stand in the place of honor on Asher’s cake.

Letter from Lucas’s teachers:

We are enjoying the rainy weather, thanks to our waterproof gear. Inside we are learning to sew, finger knit, knead our bread and chop the vegetables for our Friday soup. Many boats are being created for the “Little Ones” to go on an adventures. The children have grown kinder and gentler with one another and everyone has become friends.

 Soon it will be Valentine’s Day. There is no need for you and your child to make 24 Valentines for the other children. I have found this can be overwhelming. Instead we will be making Valentines for you at school, having fun while practicing our cutting and gluing.

 Our school auction is on Saturday, March 15. This is a lively event with many treasures to be purchased to help support our school. You are invited to a delicious dinner, a silent auction and a live auction. There is also an opportunity to attend as a volunteer. Each class gives a gift and our kindergarten has traditionally given a set of puppets. We decided to make a countryside set with a farmer, his wife, children, animals, etc. Please join us on February 6 and 13 for an evening of conversation, sewing and fun.  We will gather all the supplies, This is an opportunity to learn to sew, and to make a puppet which each of the older children in the kindergarten will be making after the spring break. We are asking for a $5.00 donation for the supplies. This can be put in the envelope on the shelf by the classroom door. We use the lids of frozen juice or spaghetti sauce for the bottoms of the puppets so if you have any of these we would appreciate it.

Frostee, Asher, and I were having lunch last Thursday (1/24) at a sushi restaurant. Asher somehow leaned over in his high chair just wrong and bonked his mouth on the marble tabletop. He cried pretty hard and I could tell he was hurt, but I didn’t see it happen, so I wasn’t sure what he hit, exactly. After a few minutes he stopped crying. We finished our lunch and went on our way. About 20 to 30 minutes later, I noticed that his front left incisor was chipped. He knocked a small chip out of his tooth when he hit the table. 

Later, I could feel the jagged edge of the tooth when nursing him. I called our dentist/uncle and made an appointment.

This morning we went in to see the dentist. He agreed it would be best to smooth out the poky part. I held poor Asher’s body and head still while the assistant held down his arms and my uncle smoothed out the tooth with what looked and sounded like a tiny power grinder. Poor baby cried and struggled and turned bright red with frustration. Fortunately, it was over very quickly. He got a plastic bath toy out of the deal, but he seemed pretty pissed off about the experience. He’s currently sleeping it off. 

Before and After photos on flickr.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/37914323@N00/2226261841/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/37914323@N00/2227052454/

I still have to take a picture showing the smoothed tooth. 

IMG_4323
Originally uploaded by SarabellaE

Messy baby photos available.

I love this one to pieces.

IMG_4422
Originally uploaded by SarabellaE

I believe Lucas has made a huge leap in his cognition. I see it coming through in surpising ways. On January 13 he built a huge block city with almost perfect symmetry. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen him build anything with any care for that aesthetic. I took lots of pictures.

I have also been taking pictures of some of his lego creations. They have also ramped up in complexity, indicating to me a change in his spatial thinking and engineering ability. We’re talking helicopters with spinning rotors, mummy’s tombs, and—of all things—a bird. I’ll post some of those soon.

Sometimes I sit back and realize that I’m just here to provide a warm place and food so that this genius can unfold in the universe. It seems determined to do so.

 “We’re brothers together, friends forever!”

I remembered some more stuff I want to say about Asher and who he is right now.

The pottying thing (EC) has suffered a lot since Asher learned to crawl. It is MUCH harder to guage when he needs to pee now, and he is so busy exploring the house and everything in it he doesn’t really signal that he has to go. So we have had a lot more diapers to wash since about mid November than we had for the 5 months prior to that. That nifty thing he used to do—waking me up in the night to tell me he had to pee—doesn’t happen anymore. Now he wakes up once or twice a night to complain because he has peed and he’s uncomfortable. Still, we manage to get him to the potty in time sometimes, which makes me happy because I just want him to be used to going there. It may be time to consult the book again in search of more EC tips.

Self-feeding is pretty cool! Asher got really picky over the last few days, refusing to eat even the mushy foods that he has always enjoyed. It appears that he would like to do more self-feeding, so I’m trying to figure out little, soft foods that he can pick up and eat. He doesn’t have many teeth (no molars at all), so it has to be food that he can mash. The bananas aren’t recognized as food by him, although they’re great for squishing in his hands. Other no-gos include: tofu most of the time, corn kernels, and steamed apples. The cheese tortellini cut in half and covered in pesto sauce have been a hit, though (see today's other post). At Christmas dinner, he loved the mashed potatoes. 

Asher now claps his hands when he is happy, especially if we say “Yay!” and clap about something he has done, like signing appropriately. His little chubby face lights up when he claps. It’s gorgeous. It’s clear that he understands many words that we say. 

It’s completely adorable when Asher crawls into the bathroom while Lucas is in the tub. Asher pulls himself up against the side of the bathtub to peer in and watch Lucas. So far, they get along beautifully, except when Asher knocks down Lucas’s block cities. I have to remind Lucas not to yell at his little brother. Asher laughs and laughs at Lucas’s weird antics and funny voices. Lately, Lucas has been playing chipmunks. (My parents let Lucas watch a few Chip and Dale cartoons, and ever since, he’s been fascinated with the stories.) Anyway, Lucas is Chip and Asher is Dale. Lucas talks in a thoroughly obnoxious, high, squeaky voice and Asher eats it up.

When Asher gets really excited and he’s sitting on the ground, he starts bouncing. He can actually travel forward by bouncing on his bottom! I suppose this is the natural evolution of the arm flapping that he used to do when he was younger.

Tomorrow, Asher and I start attending a Mommy and Baby class that will be held one morning a week at Lucas’s Waldorf school. It’s not because Asher needs to go to school to learn how to be a baby. And I don’t need classes on how to be a mommy (maybe I could use classes on how to be a better mommy). But it sounds like it will be fun and we’ll get to socialize with others. The teacher asked me on the phone why I want to come to the class. I told her it was because I need to learn some new songs. I’m sick to death of the songs that I know and I’d like to learn new ones to sing to my kids. I don’t sight read music all that well: I have to hear it first. She thought that was funny.