You know what’s great?

Having buddies that are into the same kinds of things you are into …

Having some time to sit and imagine and build and laugh, side by side …

Enjoying the play without thinking about the fact that you’re learning stuff …

Sometimes there are setbacks. Stuff breaks, but when friends are there to encourage you, it’s OK.

There’s always a new way to try it, and sometimes new environments to play in. Why not?

And the delight in achievement is so very nice.

Asher and I are spending more time together lately, which means I have to come up with things to do for us to enjoy the days. Meaningful work is one of the keystones to happy preschoolers, so I’ve been roping Asher into some household activities for some fun and frolic.

That’s his own dirty clothes that he’s washing. The novelty of this activity was very appealing to him, and he likes that he got them clean. It didn’t take long for him to figure out the best way to have fun was to stomp the clothes clean. I showed him how to rinse them and then hang them up on the patio chair backs to dry. Presumably he did that before he sat in the basins to splash and play because when I came back to him (I was gardening), he had hung all the items up to dry.

Earlier this week, we decided to bake some muffins together. I have a lovely strawberry bread recipe that works well as muffins, too. And since we have zucchini from our garden we grated some to add to the recipe. Asher took to this task beautifully as well.

The muffins are yummy, and now I know to cook them 22 minutes instead of 25. We ate some right away, as soon as they came out of the oven and were cool enough to eat.

Strawberry Zucchini Bread

1 c. strawberry puree (2 10-oz packages of frozen berries or two pint baskets)

1 c. grated zucchini

4 eggs

1 c. vegetable oil (my next task is to figure out if I can substitute coconut oil)

3 c. flour (all-purpose or a mix of all-purpose and whole wheat)

1 1/2 c. sugar (you can use less if you want)

2 teaspoons cinnamon

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 c. chopped nuts (optional)

Note: If you want to make these muffins extra healthy, you can add a couple of tablespoons of ground flax, protein powder, or a 1/2 cup of rolled oats. These all make good additions.

Combine strawberry puree, zucchini, eggs, and oil. Blend in sugar, cinnamon, and baking soda. Add flour(s) and nuts, if using. Batter will be pinkish! Pour into greased and floured loaf pans (9 x 5 inch). Bake 40-50 mins. at 350 degrees. Cool completely before removing from pans. Makes two loaves.

Muffin variation:

Pour batter into greased muffin tin (or use papers). Bake at 350 degrees for 22 minutes. Watch closely. Makes about 18 muffins.

Although I don’t think he has ever seen one, I can’t help but think of this as Asher’s iPad. He calls it his “video game board,” chooses games, and pushes buttons while wearing a serious game face.

Asher has copied Lucas in this practice of making up his own “video games” out of paper. Lucas recently made paper DS-style handheld game devices for both himself and Asher. They hold these and push buttons and make wicked-cool sound effects. Both are masters at leveling up in these games.

Some might say my kiddos are deprived since they don’t have real video games of any sort. I say they are creative.

1. Receive bill. Gape.
2. Consider bank account balance.
3. Write check. Place in provided, stamped envelope and seal envelope.
4. Place envelope into mail box for mail pickup.
5. Check one small task off very long To-Do list.

“Mama, I got the mail. You got a check!”

“Thank you, Asher. You are very helpful.”

6. Find new envelope.
7. Write recipient’s address on envelope. Add return address label.
8. Carefully peel off provided stamp from ripped-up provided envelope.
9. Place salvaged stamp on new envelope.

“Asher, please take this letter to the mailbox. The mailman will come and take it away.”

“I did it, Mama!”

It’s Wednesday. The first one since Asher’s preschool let out for the summer. Today I have babysitting starting at 2-something so that I can work this afternoon and hopefully meet my deadlines this week. The day is stretching out before us.

To be honest, we are having some ups and downs. Lucas is not around, so Asher’s attention is focused on needing my attention. And frankly, I’m out of practice. I am now trying to remember how to spend long summer days with a rambunctious 4-year-old.

The Ups

A forty-minute walk on the American River Bike Trail, under shady live oaks and with wildflowers along the trail, was a nice start to the day. Asher was less into it than I was, and kept wanting to talk about monsters and Batman villains. Before we went very far, he was ready to go home. I must remember to adjust my expectations. And walking with a 4-year-old is not exercise.

A shower with a spray bottle. Yep, a little cold water in a household spray bottle in the warm shower with a 4-year-old is a great time. He gets to spray me all he wants, and I still get to shower. If I squeal a bit about the cold water he’s spraying on my skin, his delight is magnified. Plus, there are slippery, wet kisses to steal, too.

Making popsicles with what’s on hand. Today we made orange juice, blueberry yogurt pops with mango chunks—using the blender, so there were shiny buttons to push. Asher carefully carried each popsicle mold to the freezer and wedged it between the wires of the top shelf to freeze. He’s excited about these. I find it fun to use the same popsicle molds that were my mother’s. We are missing only two bottoms and handles. I must keep an eye out for these at the thrift store.

Harvesting spent calendula flowers from the garden. Oh, Asher didn’t actually want to help with this, but he wandered around in the yard with me while I did it.

The Downs

I learned that I can’t playfully spray Asher with a gentle spray from the garden hose. He doesn’t want to get wet, and assumes that if he gets wet he’ll be ITCHY! Hysterics ensued and, despite my apologies, he said he hates me and thinks I’m the worst. He sneaked up on me to poke me with things. Oh, and he said he is going to break all of my things.

There were tricks played on me, too. “Mama, please come and wipe my bottom! Please.  … Ha-ha! I didn’t even go poop! I tricked you!”

“Mama, I put the pillows away.” No, he did not put the pillows away.

“Mama, I’m gonna kiss you.” Then he licked my face. Later on, “Mama, I want to tell you a secret in your ear.” Then he licked my ear.

There are more, but I don’t have the energy to go into it. He is a rascal. Suffice it to say it’s time to rev up all those coping skills of mine. Nine and a half more weeks of summer vacation in which to focus on the ups and try not pay too much attention to the downs.

Hmmm … Look! The canas have arrived!

Yesterday was Asher’s last day of preschool. My angel boy is moving on from StarBright Garden, where Ms. Pati has taken such good care of him and provided so many opportunities for growth and friendship. We will miss her very much, and will miss this glorious garden that was so nourishing and beautiful. This swing is where Asher has spent a great portion of every day.

These girls are some of Asher’s best friends. We are delighted that they live in our neighborhood, too. In this photo they are helping work on Asher’s Fairy House. He only wants to do crafts sometimes, but when the girls and Lucas and I got involved to help him with his Fairy House, he finally got into it for a while.

Here is Asher’s Fairy House up close. There is a bark house and a bark fence, with a glass cobbled pathway. It’s got pinecone “bushes” and dried flower “trees.”

Chip-chop, chippity chop. The kids cut up vegetables for their Friday soup. Having meaningful work to do as a group is so great for them. They feel like big kids when they are given responsibilities, especially those that involve using tools like knives. After two children at preschool I now realize that it’s perfectly normal for kids this age to be very helpful with chores and household tasks at school, while they are doing it alongside their friends, and to be resistant and uninterested in such tasks at home. I try not to take it personally.

This is one of Asher’s very best buddies. They’ve been at preschool together for two years now.

Snack time is outdoors at school on lovely summer days.

Table centerpiece: a Fairy House. The kids have been working on these all month.

They’ve eaten up all the cherries, but the plums are getting ripe now and the kids have been snacking on these beauties.

These lemons hang so heavy and low, if you’re not careful you might bonk your head on them.

The bunnies and chickens get all the veggie scraps. There are seven chicks this year. The beans are growing up long poles in the garden. And little S can often be found among the raspberries, picking and snacking.

Matches gets lots of love every day.

This beauty is the one Asher says he’s going to marry. Can you blame him?

We are hoping to have play dates with friends over the summertime. I haven’t shown all of our beloved friends here, just a few. I’m so pleased that he’s made good friends at StarBright, and has learned to socialize so well.

Some of these children will be in Asher’s kindergarten next year, and that will make for an easy transition. So much of what he’ll do next year is like the StarBright rhythm, soI expect it will be like slipping on a familiar hat: story time, circle time, snack, outdoors play, indoors play, cleanup, etc. They are beautiful days full of discovery and joy, rhythm and seasons. What a lucky boy he is!

I’m catching up from last month! I guess life has been pretty busy, and pretty good lately.

We went camping for my birthday in May to Wright’s Beach, which is where my family always went for vacation when I was a kid. I love this beach with my whole heart.

We spent two chilly nights there in Ian’s old family tent. We wandered on the beach, collected small seashells and pebbles, flew kites, and read books. Lucas did a lot of whittling with his new pocket knife, making arrows and spears and assorted sharp and pointy items. The boys bickered a lot, and unfortunately this beach isn’t terribly safe for playing chase with the waves. There are signs posted everywhere saying how Wright’s Beach is one of the deadliest beaches in California. Funny, I don’t remember that tidbit from my childhood, and while I do remember gettting knocked about by the waves, my brother and I always survived. When the ranger came around in her truck to tell us under no circumstances should we allow the boys to touch the water, well, we decided to play by the rules. Still, we had plenty of fun and Daddy’s delicious grilled steak, plus s’mores!

The next day we packed up early and drove five minutes down the coast to Duncan’s Cove, where the beach was more sheltered and the wind wasn’t so bad. We explored and found lots of wildflowers. Lucas found a great rock to jump from onto the sand below. It was quite a drop!

Here we did let Lucas get his feet wet. Asher didn’t let the waves get anywhere near him before he began running for the dry sand.

It was cold and windy up on the bluff. The views were amazing and so were the flowers. Asher enjoyed wearing his camelbak.

We picnicked on Portuguese Beach before beginning our drive home. A beach picnic with beautiful seagulls, sandwiches, champagne, and peach pie is tops in my book!

This is one of the fun things about Bodega Bay. The Lucas Warf sign photo.

We stopped at the candy and kites store. I enjoy all the flags and spinning things. Ian says I am allowed to be an old woman with flags someday, as long as we make them ourselves.

It was a great weekend and I’m glad I got to show my children this place that’s so special to me. Even if we never go there again, it was delightful to have all those fond childhood memories come flooding back.

And after we came home, I had some fun playing with my seagull photos. Tee hee!

How’s your summer going? Temps had been in the 100s around here last week, but they’ve dropped back into a totally livable zone. The cherries have been divine. These are from Asher’s preschool.

I got exactly one flower on my butterfly iris this year—this one is the neighbor’s. I think it’s time to feed all of my plants.

Although Asher is attending preschool until the end of this month, Lucas is thoroughly enjoying summer vacation. He’s spending days with his grandmothers and with friends, having friends over, practicing piano, doing a little skills maintenance in a summer workbook, painting, and reading. We’ve been reading some Harry Potter together, and last night we started Bunnicula.

Our lives are full of colors …

… and plenty of delicious flavors.

This was our Father’s Day dinner that I made. Ian cooks most of our evening meals. I never manage to take pictures of Ian’s delicious dinners, though. I’m too preoccupied by eating them to remember my camera. I’ll make a better effort.

Asher is the king of dress-up. He loves to accessorize and has fallen in love with Lucas’s old Spider-Man costume, to which he adds his own flair.

Lucas recently spent his own money on his first pack of Pokémon cards. He’s really into them now. The game is pretty complicated and he is fascinated by the mechanics of it. He’s still inventing his own creature-based cards, too.

We’re two weeks into Lucas’s summer break and life is good. He and I tried to go jogging yesterday. It was more walking than jogging, but I have hopes that he’ll get into it and run with me. We’ve been swimming, had play dates, and played bocce ball with friends in the park. A fine start to the summer, I think.

This is some of Asher’s most recent art. The top is an oil pastel he calls “Map to Burning Man.” We are not allowed to call it a drawing, or art. It’s A MAP. It’s also the first time I’ve seen any ladder (or train track) in his work.

Then, just a day or two later, he made this one—all ladders. These are considered to be a sign that a child is becoming ready to write.

Wednesday evening he sat in my lap while I was editing on the computer. He wanted to draw, so I handed him the second page of my SMUD bill with lots of blank white space, which was on my desk and within reach. After a moment, he pointed to his paper, which was still mostly blank. “Mom, is this an 8?” He face lit up when I said yes. And then he carefully drew several more.

We all love to dance, but somehow it was our younger son who galvanized this passion into a family ritual. We didn’t set out to make it a regular part of our family life, but before long it was. We hold After-Dinner Discos—dance parties for four that let us all cut loose for a while and get the dishes done. They are one of my favorite family activities.

We finish dinner around 7 p.m. on most nights. My boys go to bed at 8 and they usually shower before bed. Most of the time, we have a lovely 10- or 15-minute window after dinner and we crank up the music and boogie. When the daylight stretches longer into the evening, I confess we party even more, and our dancing spills out into the backyard under the sky.

What kind of music, you ask? Truly, it’s not lyres and pentatonic flutes. The music we play depends on a lot of things: What mood are we in? Is it a night near a holiday? Have we been talking about anything over dinner that brings to mind a song, a style, or a period of history?

Around St. Patrick’s Day, we all kick up our heels to the Pogues, Black 47, and the Chieftains. During Christmas time, we enjoy the Pandora online radio station called “Christmas Lounge.” At Diwali, we might put on some Bollywood film music. We dance to Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra and Aretha Franklin. We shake our booties to Lady Gaga, Cher, and Pink. My older son loves the White Stripes. The little guy loves the Beatles, Bob Marley, and Shakira. I’m fond of Michael Franti and OK Go, and Sting’s music has always been close my heart. My husband is a true musical aficionado, and he always has a fine suggestion for us. Perhaps it feels like ’80s night, or maybe a little big band music fits the bill. We sometimes play a CD called “AM Radio Hits of the ’70s.” Maybe it’s time for some Goa trance or techno. Did you know you could party to a fabulous, techno remix of an autotuned Carl Sagan lecture called “A Glorious Dawn” by Symphony of Science?

My younger son, who is now 4, feels music in his very bones. He’s really got moves, and he’s serious about it, too. He works on a new dance move for a while until he gets it to where it feels just right, to where it’s a facile part of his physical repertoire. Then he works on the next thing. Sometimes I see him mimicking one of us, working out how to make his body do the same thing. There’s no instruction of any kind, and it’s not mechanical or rigid—it’s just a natural learning about his body in space, how it feels to move through the air or place his feet just so. You should see his rock star power slide on his knees.

And he is driven to dancing to just about anything. Beethoven and Mozart work just as well for him as Katy Perry. When the spirit moves him, there’s no standing on the sidelines allowed: “Dance! Mama, Dance!” If I let a little too much of my attention stray to cleaning up our dinner mess, I hear about it. “Mama! You’ve gotta dance with me!” And heaven forbid I’m feeling under the weather. “Mama, I know what will make you better. Let’s dance!”

My older son’s dancing has changed over the years. The carefree quality of his young childhood is moving away gradually. Now, at 9 years old, he sometimes performs Eurhythmy he has learned in school, or attempts some fancy footwork, like a made-up jig or tap routine. He likes to head-bang to electric guitars (which pleases Daddy to no end), and I’ve caught my son playing the air guitar more than a few times. More often than not, these days, my older son’s dancing is morphing into a kind of acrobatic martial art of his own invention, with high kicks and blocking stances. He spins, punches, and dodges imaginary assailants in time to the music.

Before I had children, I used to imagine I’d one day be one of those moms who drives her daughters to frequent ballet lessons. I don’t do that (although if my sons asked, I would). Having boys doesn’t mean I can’t share the gift of music and dance with them, no matter the cultural forces that suggest that boys don’t dance. What better way is there to bring our family together after our long days than to crank up the tunes, revel in our bodies’ abilities, and express ourselves through dance? To get our hearts pumping and put smiles on our faces? What better way is there to have fun and celebrate life?