Call me crazy, but I’m planning an equinox celebration with some dear friends for Tuesday night. I’ve been exchanging emails and making plans with another mommy who will help me bring this together. (She is amazingly creative and a culinary wiz—just exactly the kind of person you need when you’re up to your neck in deadlines and still think it’s a good idea to throw a party.)

It’s not uncommon for me to create a ceremony or holiday celebration at the last minute; I sometimes wake up in the morning and decide we must have a wonderful, wholesome, festival dinner that night, which involves a lot of crazy scrambling around, digging in cupboards and running to the grocery store. I’m a great one for vision, but not much for planning.

I’m feeling good that I’ve started two whole days ahead this time!

We’re thinking beef and pumpkin stew, served in a pumpkin, of course! Hearty greens and other harvest sides will grace our table. We’re planning a lovely craft for the children to enjoy. And my, oh, my! How do caramel apples sound to you?  Are you drooling yet?

I can belong now to myself

And shining spread my inner light

Into the dark of space and time.

Toward sleep is urging all creation,

But inmost soul must stay awake

And carry wakefully sun’s glowing

Into winter’s icy flowing.

—Rudolf Steiner (verse for the week of September 8–14)

There dims in damp autumnal air

The senses’ luring magic;

The light’s revealing radiance

Is dulled by hazy veils of mist.

In distances around me I can see

The autumn’s winter sleep;

The summer’s life has yielded

Itself into my keeping.

—Rudolf Steiner (verse for the week of September 8–14)

It’s been a busy, busy week full of adjustments for everyone. Lucas went back to school on Tuesday. There was much rejoicing by his proud parents. He looked ready,  brave, and determined.

Lucas and Asher on the first day of school.

Honestly, I’m so excited for him. This year is going to be wonderful, full of friends, new confidence, Saints and fables to inspire us, as well as dragons to conquer.

Right before entering the second-grade classroom.

We have had some struggles this week. Daddy had to go out of town for a conference on Wednesday morning, and we are emotionally at sea without our anchor. We are used to our days without Daddy, but when evening sneaks in we all look around at each other and miss him terribly. Asher has had a much harder than usual time at Ring-A-Rosies preschool and had to be picked up early two days. He is adjusting to Lucas being gone at school and Daddy not coming home at night, and he’s quite sure the scenario stinks. “I miss my daddy. I want my brother!”

As if to emphasize that change is in the air, Lucas’s top right incisor leaned sooooooo far out of his mouth that Lucas couldn’t help himself; he simply pried it out. And so, my 7-and-1/4-year-old son now has a giant window in his smile, and an adult tooth moving in fast.

See how delighted he is?

Look at the size of that gap!

As you can see, he is quite thrilled about the change and told me all about how he pushed the tooth back until it just popped out “… and there was this dangly gut thingy hanging there!”

We got to use the Tooth Fairy Pillow I made him for the third time, and this morning a $2 bill was sticking out of the pocket.

We all have big plans for the weekend: I’m flying down to Santa Barbara tonight for my first vacation alone with my husband in three years. I went to college in Santa Barbara for two years, and I haven’t been there since 1992. Ian and I courted there, so I’m thinking of this trip as a little honeymoon that we desperately need.

The boys will be going to my parents’ house, who will undoubtedly spoil them and feed them ice-cream sandwiches and sausages and pizza and all their favorite things. I can tell Lucas and Asher are anxious (as evidenced by the tantrums and invented neck aches and “too warm” foreheads), and possibly this isn’t the best weekend for me to leave them, after such an eventful week. And I’m tempted to feel tremendously guilty about it.

Nevertheless, I’m carrying on in the belief that a happy, rested mama, who has had the chance to have fun, reconnect with her husband, and recharge her marriage, will be a better mother for them in the long run.

And they will be fine.

On the trails along the American River, a tiny lizard crossed our path and crawled right up Lucas’s body and under his shirt.

Triumphs of imagination and ingenuity are worthy of celebration. Robots are cool, man!

Wake up, don your superhero cape over your pajamas, and go outside to dig.

Dear Playgroup Friends,

I just wanted to write a note and say thank you for making our summer so much fun! I think our summer playgroup was terrific this year. I sincerely hope you all had a good time participating. It seemed to me that our boys loved having the play dates to look forward to, and I know Lucas was thrilled to visit his friends’ homes—you know, to check out how the other guy lives. 😉

To recap, our boys …

* went swimming many times

* played with race cars

* rode horses

* drove electric cars

* jumped on trampolines

* played with Legos

* visited a park

* played badminton

* had a birthday party

* rode scooters and bikes

* dug in the dirt

* and snacked on many delicious foods!

Getting together these seven times this summer has helped us feel connected and nurtured our friendships. Lucas is ready to dive into the school year and play some more! I got to spend time with some moms and dads I didn’t know all that well yet. I’m grateful to count you all friends.

I wish I had pictures to share, but alas, when I hosted playgroup in June I was so busy with the kids and fixing them food I forgot to get out my camera.

With love and thanks,

Sara

(and Lucas, Ian, and Asher)

It is now the end of Week 12 of summer vacation. Week 12. Twelve. Did you hear me? TWELVE.

One more week (and a long weekend) to go.

I think, all in all, I’m in better shape than I was this time last year. This time last year I was ready to throw myself under a bus. Seriously. It wasn’t pretty.

During this circle around the sun, we have had a good summer, a busy summer, and one with more balance. Together we have had

·         evening walks

·         feasts of summer fruits

·         barbecues

·         creek play

·         rambling in the woods

·         swimming in lakes, rivers, and backyard pools

·         a trip to San Francisco and Oakland

·         a zoo visit

·         museum visits

·         glorious day-long brunches with friends at home

I’ve had plenty work to keep me occupied; it keeps my brain from turning to mush and eases my career worries.

Lucas and Asher have been occupied more this summer, too. I adore my children and think they are brilliant and fascinating (see this blog for evidence), but I know that we all benefit from having experiences away from one another. I don’t claim to have achieved balance in parenting/work, but it is definitely a major goal. Something I continue to strive for.

Asher has made friends and looks forward to playing with his kids now at Ring-A-Rosies preschool. He has even made it through a handful of full days, when I didn’t pick him up until 4 p.m. due to serious deadlines, and he napped pretty well on a little mat like the other kids.

Lucas has had a bunch of wonderful experiences with summer day camps and other activities (like pottery and soccer). Some weren’t so great (mainly the Fair Oaks Recreation and Park District day camp due to the “Thriller” incident) and we probably won’t be trying those again. But others were awesome. He is hoping to do more of the Science Adventures camps and Aquatics camps next year. The Effie Yeaw nature camps, though only a half-day, are lots of fun and Lucas feels really comfortable there. Plus he gets to hike the trails in the American River Parkway. He has done some amazing art projects that I wouldn’t have even considered doing with him because they are outside my experience. I wish that the less expensive camps had worked out to be winners; naturally it was the more expensive camps that Lucas really took to.

Next week, there is no day care. I’ll have to beg, borrow, and steal moments in which to work, when others can run herd on my little darlings. Grandma? Grandma?

I just can’t help but feel, now that kids all over town are back in school, that perhaps 13 weeks off during the summer might be a little excessive. It is very intense living with a choleric 7-year-old and a 2-and-a-half-year-old toddler!

Especially if one is just the tiniest, wee bit choleric, oneself.

I’ve written a couple of times already about the pottery class that Lucas and I took this summer. It was great fun and I’m hoping to do another class, perhaps this fall. It was five evenings during which we both learned something new and got to spend some one-on-one time together.  Our relationship seems to have benefited from having this time away from Asher. Ian and I have resolved to find more such opportunities for Lucas to be with one parent; we’re fervently hoping that this might help improve his somewhat spiky and melancholy moods.

Here is a small selection of our clay creations.

Here is Lucas’s clown. He conceived and executed this all on his own with no help at all. I think it’s adorable.

Detail from my birdie bowl.

Lucas made a small turtle he called Squirtle (à la Pokémon.) His beehive makes me think of Winnie the Pooh.

My frog and my Lucas and Asher hearts.

Lucas carefully glazed this small ball sculpture with a rainbow of colors. (I think of it as a paperweight, but I don’t know if he would agree with that description.) Choosing its glazes took him a long time because he had to find the color from among about a hundred samples, remember its number, and then find the appropriate jar of glaze. The teacher asked us to take no more than two glazes to our workspace at a time, so Lucas had to return to the table with all the glazes repeatedly.

And that little sprite guy is my invention; I had a few extra moments at the end of one class and thought he might look funny hiding in a potted plant or something.

Lastly, we both made thrown pots on the potter’s wheel. Lucas wasn’t too keen on his, so it’s not pictured here. And I made a sign for our doorstep, which you might see sometime.

As I type this, it’s not even 8:00 a.m. on Saturday morning, and yet the kids are already in the kitchen playing with clay.

A couple of weeks ago on a Friday evening we packed up the lot of us and headed up the hill to Strawberry, where Mimi, Grandpa G’s charming girlfriend, has a lovely cabin. Ian would probably like it to be known it take a long, long time to pack the four of us to go anywhere, especially overnight. Still, the effort was well worth it.

Mimi is such a gracious hostess. She thinks of everything, and her mountain getaway is full of her love expressed in the tiniest of details. Antiques from her childhood summer home, a log cabin in Idaho, decorate her Forest Service cabin in Strawberry. Every object has a story. Every book on the shelf has been carefully selected to sit there, waiting for a curious visitor to page through it. Every dish in the kitchen has it’s special home and origin. Even the jam jar has a tiny silver spoon because if it didn’t, the homemade jam wouldn’t taste as good. It’s really quite astounding that Mimi has poured so much of herself into a place that is used only sometimes.

My boys had a blast digging in the dirt and exploring the woods. It really doesn’t take much to keep small boys happy—some sticks, rocks, or mud is all they really need.

(Lucas invented some kind of esoteric game with small stones. ) Add in some magical running water and it’s heaven on earth.

We spent part of Saturday day at a small lake where the Boy Scouts have a permanent camp. It’s called Cody Lake and it was lovely. We enjoyed listening to all the bells coming from the camp across the lake. A line of boys wearing funny hats hiked past our picnic spot beside the lake.

Lucas naturally dove into Lake Cody and swam, despite the chill. Daddy accompanied the little guy into the water, which was clearly exhilarating!

We dined on delicious food, as is usually the case whenever we’re with Mimi and GG. Organic produce from our CSA came up the hill with us, including some amazing tomatoes.

By far our favorite moments were spent chatting together, exploring Lucas’s “private” island, and splashing in the creek. Maggie the dog was good-natured and always patient, unless you happened to be a squirrel or a chipmunk, in which case all bets were off.

I happily finished the baby blanket I was knitting while on this trip. This year I didn’t need to bring any freelance work with me, so I just relaxed and enjoyed myself. It was so nice to be out of town and in the woods, listening to the breeze sigh through the pines.

There are more photos on my Photos page, so click over if you like wildflowers, woods, creeks, and kids.

The baby blanket I started knitting back in March is now finally finished. I made it for my friends’ Gordon and Cindy’s new baby boy, Liam, who was born nearly six-weeks early in March. I was originally hoping to have it finished by his real due date, but alas, life and work and mothering got in the way. Then it got hot and it wasn’t quite so nice to knit in the heat. Liam is now four and a half months old, and unfortunately, August in Sacramento isn’t typical blanket weather. Nevertheless, I’m thrilled to have it completed before he entered college.

This is my biggest knitting project to date. It’s also the first project I’ve ever done that required perling. The blanket is 130 stitches across and countless rows. (I may actually try to count them so that I can know how many thousands of stitches I put into it. Sometimes math IS fun!) Every stitch was made with love and prayers for health and happiness, especially during the first few weeks of his life, when he was in the NICU.

Welcome Liam! Hope you like it.