I can’t.
I don’t know how.
I’m scared.
I’ve never even seen this before.
It’s too hard.
I’m not clever enough.
There’s not enough time.
I’m going to fail.
I’m a fake.

9 Responses to “Litany”

  • gypsy_ritsa
    December 31, 1969 at 5:00 pm


  • misterjustin
    March 12, 2009 at 11:57 pm

    Wow, how did you know my private litany?


  • tara_bella
    March 13, 2009 at 1:07 am

    One of the most incredible and terrifying moments in life is when you realize that every SANE person on the planet feels exactly this same way. We’re all just scared kids playing grown-up because it’s expected of us–even our parents, even our bosses, even the President.

    And despite that, we still haven’t blown up the world yet. Because you can, you do know how, it’s OK to be scared, you’ve seen something similar, it’s not too hard, you are clever enough, there’s always enough time, you’re going to succeed, and you are truly, always, spectacularly yourself. And so are the rest of us.

    I hope…


  • lunagirl35
    March 13, 2009 at 1:55 am

    I think you speak the voice of every inner critic
    And the good news is:
    You are strong
    You are smart
    You can create your own success
    You can ask for support
    You have friends who care for you

    I hope the litany of positive voices from those who care can drown out that blue meanie!


  • dakini_grl
    March 13, 2009 at 10:48 am

    I had a (mafia princess) roommate in Los Angeles who could be hilarious from time to time. She would say that litanies like this are important to say and write because they were a lot like sperm: the minute they hit the air, they’re dead.

    (Or maybe in the immortal words of Jay-Z, “It ain’t where I been/But where I’m about to go”)

    You are not alone, that’s for sure.

    I love you so very much, and am awed by your accomplishments. I hope you know that too. xo


  • samayam
    March 13, 2009 at 2:12 pm

    Yeah, like they said. Every rock star feels this way far more frequently than they let on. When I reflect on my feelings at the start of this job when I was first shown the mountain I had to climb I’m amazed at what I’ve accomplished one little step at a time. But I’m still terrified right now about the new rewrite I’m just starting in on and I’m dealing with all kinds of avoidance behaviors.

    I was having drinks with the CTO a few weeks back and he was also very up front about his fears about going in front of these Very Important People and talking about our product. The Founder and I later lectured CTO over dinner about how CTO needed to mention things in these meetings like “your bank already owes its business to software I wrote years ago” instead of “well… I used to work for this big software company” and he was all “aww shucks…” and implied several items from your list. This guy wrote docking software for the space station fer chrissakes.


  • thaemos
    March 13, 2009 at 2:27 pm

    Yeah, me too.


  • gypsy_ritsa
    March 13, 2009 at 9:43 pm

    What familiar words…


  • kimkimkaree
    March 14, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    Get out of my head! xo


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