Morning Time

Went to bed before 10:30 p.m. last night. Slept well despite Ian’s hacking and coughing fits. Eventually the codeine cough suppressant he took kicked in and he slept, too. I didn’t even wake up the one time Lucas needed assistance in the night. Ian handled it. So it was a good night.

At 5:30 a.m. Asher wandered into our bedroom.

When this happens, early in the morning, I have a choice. I can either banish Ian and the baby to Asher’s room, where it is pretty likely that neither of them will return to sleeping, and there’s a better than even chance Asher’s hollering protests at being deprived from my sleep-warmed skin will wake Lucas up. The other option is to reluctantly let the baby into my bed and hope to quiet him back to sleep. Rarely does this work, but when it does, it’s pretty sublime.

Not so this morning. At 5:30 the nipple tweaking began in earnest. A certain amount of this is inevitable. He is no longer allowed to nurse in the mornings, so his hands on my breasts are his coping mechanism. Sometimes, if I can bear it, he’ll eventually find a good handhold and become still. Still hands are fine. Groping, pinching, grabbing, fondling hands that make no distinction between touching with fingernails and touching with fingertips are NOT. I endured as much as I could. I remained peaceful on the outside while seething with tension and frustration on the inside. I did my very best to weave that magical sleep spell around us all.

At 6:15 I couldn’t stand it anymore. I got up, dressed, and left the screaming baby with the sleeping daddy. Asher followed me out into the still-dark living room to shriek at me for not letting him feel me up. And yes, after a few moments, he woke Lucas, too.

3 Responses to “Morning Time”

  • sarabellae
    December 31, 1969 at 5:00 pm


  • kittiliscious
    April 2, 2009 at 11:41 am

    He sure is lucky he’s cute. I think I’d be tempted to hog-tie him and stuff a sock in his mouth.

    Which is probably why I don’t have kids.


  • childofeos
    April 2, 2009 at 2:54 pm

    I agree with . I’m apparently not mommy material, either. The thought of someone doing that to me and finding myself in a position with no way to defend myself or retaliate would break me.

    I truly don’t know how you do it. I’d be beside myself. I know I’d eventually snap and smack his little hands away and lock him in his room if he wouldn’t stop attacking me. 0_0


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  • About Sara

    Thanks for visiting! I’m Sara, editor and writer, wife to Ian, and mother of two precious boys. I am living each day to the fullest and with as much grace, creativity, and patience as I can muster. This is where I write about living, loving, and engaging fully in family life and the world around me. I let my hair down here. I learn new skills here. I strive to be a better human being here. And I tell the truth.

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