Lucas and his friends celebrated his birthday at Sunrise Rollerland, a roller-skating rink that has been open since the 1970s. Ian and I both learned to skate there as children, and we spend many a hot, Sacramento summer day inside the roller rink letting the “wind” from skating keep us cool (of course, we didn’t know each other then). So it was kind of a surprise when Lucas said he wanted to have his party there. This was the first year that we didn’t host his birthday party in our home, and it was a little weird (for me) letting go of important things like the food and birthday cake. But the novelty and specialness of the party were just the ticket for my big boy. I think he really felt wonderful!

A bunch of Lucas’s school friends attended the party and they were all relatively new skaters. Yet they all had a great time and were very brave. My favorite moment was watching four 8-year-old boys all skating hand in hand together (and falling in succession).

Lucas is still pretty unsteady on his wheels, but my how brave he is! He fell over and over again and yet never quit. He kept getting back up and trying again. It was inspiring to see him tackle this with such determination. Thaemos came along and was a great help. I was pleased some of the parents stayed and skated, too!

It was really tough getting good shots, the light was so dim. Asher didn’t want to skate at all, and didn’t want me to skate either. But I did and he threw a tantrum. OMG! It was sooooooo fun to be on skates again! I missed the Air Supply, Journey, Boston, and Rush that used to blast out of the sound system. (Disney princess music really isn’t my favorite.) I tried to get the DJ to play the Star Wars theme music because I thought the boys would just burst if it came on, but she didn’t have it! Lucas’s buddies were more successful when they requested the theme from Indiana Jones.

By the end of the party, all the boys had new bruises and blisters on their feet, which I take to be evidence that a good time was had by all. Lucas sure did!

Later that day, we saw most of the same kids at the school’s 50th anniversary family picnic, and Lucas got an extended playtime with his friends.

(Letter was begun on April 30 and finished on May 3)

Dear Lucas,

It’s only a day until your 8th birthday. You are over the moon with excitement. I think perhaps no child has ever anticipated any birthday as much as you have this one. You cannot wait to be 8! As the youngest child in your class, you have watched all of your friends turn 8 already. A couple of them have already turned 9. I’m sorry, dear one, but it may always be this way for you. It might be hard to be the youngest child sometimes, and might sometimes feel not fair, but I don’t worry about you much. Your charisma and joyful attitude make you beloved by all. And you would not have wanted to wait to start school another year! Your mind is racing ahead of your age in almost every way, there was no way we could have held you back.

So many exciting things are happening in your life now. I can see you are so eager to find out what’s next, what new opportunity is coming your way. I can see that you’re maturing, becoming more comfortable in your body and in your roles as student, brother, and as helping, cooperative son.

Sometimes I look at you and my love for you just pours out of me, and washes over you, I hope, wherever you are. I wonder if you can tell when I’m feeling this way. Sometimes I catch your eye and rather than make a big scene, I just wink. In that tiny moment, when you smile and wink back, I see that you know you are loved. The moments when you happily hold my hand in public, when you approach me and throw your arms around my middle and bury your face in my chest, when you snuggle up to me and tell me how much you love me—these are miracles every time, in part because they are coming a little less often than before. And I gobble these moments up like chocolates, try to fill myself with them, as if for a coming famine.

We had to strike a deal recently. You were angry with me, complaining that I was treating you too much like a baby. “You never let me do ___,” you accused. We were butting heads: you wanting more independence, me seeing you taking risks and acting wild and wanting to corral you. A friend of mine suggested a solution and so far it has worked. One day a week now you are picked up from school extra late, like at 5 or 5:30 in the evening. You want this extra time to play with your friends who are in aftercare. You want more freedom. In exchange, you must be better about coming with me at pickup time, without argument or hassle. I’m grateful my friend suggested this deal, this privilege. I was caught up in old patterns of thinking—feeling guilty for all the time we don’t spend together, wanting to gather you up at the end of your day, as if to apologize for all the time I’m working. But you are ready for more, for new experiences and new challenges. Your dad and I respect that.

You are doing well in school. Your reading is coming along nicely and you’ve been really into the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, which I have mixed feelings about. On the plus side, you’re excited about them and practicing reading. Once in a while we wake up and find you reading on the couch with the light on, having risen before the rest of us. That is nothing short of a miracle, in more ways than one. On the downside, I think the content of these books is a little old for you. In math, you are learning to add multiple-digit numbers and the new task is to figure out the process of carrying the one to the next place when adding columns of numbers. One paper that came home recently clearly indicated that you don’t understand this yet. I found myself in the astonishing position of 1) having you sit with me in an open, receptive mood, while we worked through the confusing problems together, and 2) teaching you MATH! Not my best subject, but second-grade math is OK. Next year? Not so sure how much help I’ll be. Your confidence in math is a little low right now. At one point, you told me that a buddy of yours is “Way smarter than me.” Au contraire, my son. I hope I reassured you.

Let’s see… I think your favorite school subjects are gardening, movement, German, and language arts. Gardening at school has inspired you to have your own vegetable patch here at home. In fact, you sacrificed half of your precious digging hill to plant tomatoes, a cucumber, a watermelon, rainbow chard, corn and pumpkins. It’s a lot packed into a small area, but for now it looks modest. We left a little space just for digging. And you carefully made rows in the rest, amending the soil a bit before planting your plants and seeds. I fervently hope this garden grows well for you. We have plans to make a little fence around it.

Part of you is fascinated by the idea of homeschooling, but I know in real life you would miss your friends terribly if we took you out of school. Plus, homeschooling is not always about playing Legos all day. We are not considering this at all. But, in deference to your interests, we may try to do a bit of “homeschooling” this summer. Perhaps some science projects, some story writing, some math and other cool games. One big project may be to build a chicken coop with Dad!

Two weeks ago you started piano lessons for the first time. You like your teacher and are excited to be learning how to play. We’re not calling it “practice time,” according to your teacher. We are calling it “playing” so that piano stays fun for you. I hope this is something that you’ll fall in love with.

You have been doing a lot more cooking lately, usually with Dad and often to make scrambled eggs in the morning. You two get along so well—most of the time. I’m hoping you might get a kids’ cookbook for your birthday so we can all explore this together. You’ve already made mozzarella cheese, after all! We did this all together a couple of months ago and it was totally fun! Today you made spinach sandwiches for Asher and yourself, and used the stove to make celery soup. You’re considering creating your own recipe book, using only recipes you invent yourself.

Let’s talk about sticks for a moment. My word! Where do you find them all? It seems like I’m constantly wondering where they come from and how come I never noticed them before. They are the world’s most perfect toy, apparently for any age between 1 and … well, 8 at least. Trouble is, sticks are devious little things, for they tempt you (and Asher) into highly rambunctious sword fighting, and all other martial arts. Occasionally I get fed up with the wacking-with-sticks play and confiscate them, removing them to the green waste bin. And then, twenty minutes later, your hands are full of more sticks!

Asher is now a proper playmate for you much of the time. He mimics your every word and move. It’s quite adorable when you’re both behaving well. You play pretend “battles” with “powers,” which involves a lot of running, jumping, dramatic magical gesturing and many, many sound effects with spitting. It’s better than actual hitting most of the time. You both get carried away, though, and you both take great pleasure in winding each other up into states of ire and violence, especially if sticks are involved. “He hit me!” “Asher, NO!” The bickering is perfectly normal.

What I love, however, is when I find you and Asher sitting together on the couch, arms around each other, or cuddled up in bed together at night. Sometimes I catch you reading to Asher and my heart just melts. I see you guide him in parking lots, offering your hand as protection from passing cars. You greet him with a giant, feet-off-the-ground-swing-around hug at the end of the school day. You brag to your friends about how cool your little brother is. You tell Asher that he is your buddy, that he’s adorable, and that you’re best friends. These are moments we, as your parents, cherish.

***

And now, it’s two days after your birthday, May 3, 2010. You seem perfectly satisfied with the fuss we made over your turning 8, and frankly, so am I. What a wonderful weekend it was! We had a great time roller-skating at Sunrise Rollerland with your friends. You are a determined roller-skater, and although you fell down often, you kept getting up, your resolve never flagging. I admire your stubborn perseverance; I think it’s a quality that will serve you well in life. You seem delighted with all of your gifts: new craft projects, science kits, books, Legos, modeling clay, BIKE, game, model, and much more! I’m thrilled to see you riding your new bike—it is probably the coolest bike I’ve ever seen (complete with skull art) and it’s your favorite color (which is back to blue these days after having cycled through red and green).

You shared your birthday with two special events at school: the 50th anniversary of Sacramento Waldorf School and the May Day Festival, which was on the 2nd. This just carried you along on a wave of celebration and delight, allowing you tons of extra time to range and roam with your school buddies and to have lots of fun. I like how much you now seem to own the school campus. It’s your turf and you’re comfortable there. It was such a great weekend; I hope it was everything you wished for.

Lucas, we love you. We are so proud of you. Happy 8th birthday, my love!

Mama

Oh, the wheels are turning!

Of course, my best ideas strike me at 11 p.m. and/or right at the last minute, when it’s way too late to get started or when I must rush like crazy to carry them out. I was having such an easy run up to this birthday, given that the roller-skating party was paid for a couple of weeks ago and they won’t let me bring food to the rink. The presents have arrived. Invitations sent out.

But then—BOOM! Oh! I should do/make/wrap/paint/buy/arrange/decorate/create/bake …

You get the picture. Yeah. I’m that kind of crazy.

The Crown

When I made a birthday crown for Asher (also at the last minute back in January), Lucas was quite enchanted with it. I asked him if he would like to have a birthday crown of his own and he was all for it.

So, I vowed to make one for him.

Of course, the likelihood that he will wear it at 8 years old is fairly slim. Nevertheless … here is my design. Shh! He hasn’t seen it and I want it to be a surprise.

The Goodie Bags

I don’t know when this children’s birthday party tradition began, but I don’t like it much. I think it kind of reeks of 1980s überparents fearing for their wee ones’ self-esteem and worrying that attending a birthday party and watching a birthday child open gifts when there are none for the wee guests would somehow scar them for life. But, I must live in my times. And so, we make goodie bags. We try to have a bit of fun with them and try not to spend a ton of dough. And lest you think I’m a complete curmudgeon, I am well aware of how thrilled Lucas is to come home from a friend’s party with a goodie bag of his own!

This year, we are giving out brown paper lunch bags, hand-painted by Lucas. He is painting whatever he pleases and I think that’s just fine. I think they are fighting dragons. We are putting  little envelopes of pumpkin seeds that we saved from our orange and white Halloween pumpkins in the bags. I bought lovely (and masculine-looking) blank books from the $1 bins at the craft store, so each guest will receive a book and a matching pencil. If the boys attending the birthday party are anything at all like Lucas, they will be pleased to have their own book to write whatever in. Let’s see … we also have a small tablet of origami paper for each guest, which comes with instructions to make animals, also from the $1 bins.

The Birthday Cake

Well, the roller rink is handling this. But I will make a cake for us to share with grandparents this weekend. I have a cool idea for this! We’ll see if I can pull it off.

A Gift

While Lucas was painting some goodie bags this afternoon, and Asher was painting a picture, I sat down and painted a gift for Lucas.

We are closely watching this praying mantis egg sack in my dogwood tree. Ian noticed it first. I can’t wait to have babies!

Singular and spectacular, this iris in my front garden seems to be inviting me to stare into the sun.

My old fashioned rose bush had an intimate visitor today.

On April 20, just a week ago, our sunny backyard was pelted with hail!

Miners’ lettuce we found on our hike in Muir Woods. Lucas is always eating this stuff. The first time he did so, when he was 3 and a half and plucked it from the trailside and I didn’t know what it was, I nearly had a heart attack. I shook Ian and screeched, “Is it edible? Is it?”

Earth Day was last week, you know. In past years, we have planted trees in honor of Earth Day. This year we decided to do a little science experiment and care for one of our more unusual housemates.

Lucas and Daddy feed the Venus flytrap plant a tiny bug.

It’s tricky work, imitating a bug so that the plant will close its leaf around the meal.

Our Earth Day dinner table setting, complete with wayside dandelions, and the boys eagerly watching the feeding project.

Thanks to Parnasus for this great idea! We have a simple science experiment of window seed germination going. We have three types of seeds (wheat, corn, and pumpkin) in plastic bags filled with moist cotton balls and taped to the sliding glass door.  (I’m bummed about that branding all over our experiment, but oh well.) The seeds are getting several hours of bright morning sunshine each day.

See the tiny wheat berries germinating? One or two have a little leaf already. This photo was taken only two and a half days after we put the seeds into the bags and taped them up! By using cotton balls instead of soil, we can see both the roots and shoots!

Life is good. What a fabulous weekend!

My dear Dakini had dinner with us on Friday night. We are so fortunate to have her living so close. The children did all their wacky tricks for her.

On Saturday, I got to attend the Waldorf in the Home conference on Mothering and Spirituality: Resourcing Feminine Wisdom, put on by Rahima Baldwin Dancy of Informed Family Life and author of You Are Your Child’s First Teacher, which was held at my son’s school here in Fair Oaks. I only attended on Saturday because of resources and because I’m not ready to spend all weekend at a conference away from my boys. But I’m so, so glad I went! It was so inspiring and awesome to be in a huge high school gym full of women (and a few men) talking about the goddess and the feminine divine. Seriously, I’ve never been anywhere with that many people willing to even consider the topic in my life, and it’s a topic very close to my heart, particularly during my twenties. We heard keynote speaker Nancy Jewel Poer (“Honoring Mother Spirit and our Amazing Spiritual Feminine Gifts”), author of Living Into Dying and children’s book Mia’s Apple Tree and a founder and faculty member of Rudolf Steiner College and the founding teacher for Cedar Springs Waldorf School. She showed amazing slides of goddesses/world-mothers from all traditions and the modern day and spoke of the soul work of mothering. She asserted that women are the bridges between heaven and earth, bringing spiritual inspiration, love, and beauty to the lives of all those around us.

We also heard keynote speaker Regina Sara Ryan, author of The Woman Awake: Feminine Wisdom for Spiritual Life. She spoke about becoming Mother and seeking the Universal Ma, and encouraged us to cultivate ways to see and honor the Mother in us all. Big on her list of recommendations was to find our Delight and Creativity, whatever they are, and then engage in them regularly because this is a way to build love. It was all seriously cool. It made me think of all my dear Adelphai, with whom I have wandered many a California hillside and braved many a starlit night to find our goddesses.

I went to a great workshop called “Mothering Our Lively Sons,” which I’m sure you’ll agree was created just for me! Or so it seemed. I got some new insight on boys and their needs, their unique way of communicating and processing language. I’ve definitely come away with some good ideas to ruminate on and techniques to try out at home.

I loved the conference, but I was also delighted to come home to my two wonderful sons and my tireless, selfless husband. Asher fell asleep in my arms and we had one of those glorious moments together, rocking in the rocking chair, holding and being held and feeling perfectly at peace with the world. I don’t always feel this way as a mom, so when I do, I hope to cup it gently in my heart so that the feeling may feed me in times of stress and angst.

And the rest of the weekend was superb, too.

There was a haircut for Lucas, who said, “Thanks, Mom! I feel great about my haircut.” We put Lucas’s hair clippings out in the backyard in the hopes the birds would find them and use his silky locks for their nests. Is that gross or sweet? I don’t know…

We enjoyed a steak dinner with sauteed chard from our garden, made by Ian, who spent his Saturday replacing my car battery, caring for our children, and finishing our flagstone pathway. Oh, and cooking us dinner.

Some hot tub time with my hubby under the stars.

We made a trip to the nursery (squee!) for ground cover to plant between the flagstones on our new garden path.

Lucas pronounced that he wished to turn part of the boys’ digging hill into a vegetable garden. After our cautioning that he and Asher would have less space to dig if he planted a garden, he confidently told us he was really wanting to do it. I guess he’s enjoying gardening class at school! So, we bought seeds (corn, rainbow chard) and four tomato plants, a watermelon plant, and a fancy cucumber. We amended the soil a bit and he set to planting them himself. He also planted pumpkin seeds that we had saved from our (orange and white) jack-o’-lanterns from last fall.

We had a lovely two-mile bike ride with NoNo and Mars this afternoon, who were gracious enough to ride all this way to meet us. It was a fun reminder that riding bikes is so good for us all. Asher is outgrowing his toddler seat on the back of my (girly, girly pink) bike, yet I don’t think he’s quite ready for the tagalong bike. His feet kept kicking my calves as I pedaled!

Ian filled up our bird feeder that had languished in the garage long enough.

We spent time in the shade planting our new ground covers: chamomile lawn, pennyroyal, and ajuga (chocolate chip variety). We’re hoping they will fill in the spaces between the stones. The chamomile lawn and pennyroyal smell marvelous when you touch them! See how cute the ajuga is?

The boys played in the sprinklers.

I used scotch tape to repair of a very well loved, well used copy of Where’s Waldo in Hollywood that used to belong to Grandma’s third grade class.

For Sunday dinner, Ian’s yummy broiled tuna steaks with homemade lemon aoili, salad, and green beans! And a fine Petite Sirah accompanied them.

Our bedtime stories were two stories from A Donsy of Gnomes, a sweet book I bought at the conference. Lucas’s eyes were full of stars when I read him the stories, and that, my friends, makes it all worthwhile.

We visited Muir Woods National Monument last Sunday. It’s a gorgeous old-growth coast redwood forest that sits on the edge of the Golden Gate National Recreation Area of California. We were hoping for a shady, easy hike for our kiddos in a breathtaking environment and my, did we get it! The price of admission was free, thanks to the National Park Service offering free admission the week of April 17 to April 25 in honor of Earth Day…

… which is today. So Happy Earth Day!

It was a perfect day. Gorgeous, warm. The park was crowded, but not so much that we felt we had made a mistake by coming. While hiking we heard at least six different languages being spoken, and possibly many more. At some point, my Californian ear just gives up and tries to determine a basic geographical origin, not a specific language. People were mostly very friendly.

I took this picture while sitting on a bench and leaning way, way back to shoot the tree behind me.

Twisty roots beside the path.

Sparkling leaves (Bigleaf Maple, I think).

The woods were bathed in shafts of sunlight and great swaths of shadow.

Leaping over a rivulet. Everywhere Lucas went, Asher followed closely behind. I think we all hiked about four miles that day, and Asher kept right up.

Lucas has a great eye for spotting creatures and also a gentle touch.

Goethe would be so proud! Lucas took his sketchbook and colored pencils along so he could draw in the forest. He chose as his subject the Bicentennial Tree, which started its life right around the time of our nation’s birth. There was a plaque and everything.

The creek runs through the park, at times quiet and other times burbling.

Another of Lucas’s trail finds: a very quick beetle.

A pretty lady we met along the way. Ferdinand Iris?

Too many pictures in one post? Probably. Sorry. I have many more on Flickr if you care to visit Muir Woods with us—sort of. Anyway, I hope for Earth Day you get to visit some unique, wild, or beautiful place on this earth, even if it’s only your own backyard.

It’s so easy to fall in love with nature in the springtime. I do every year. I know not everybody is into Earth Day and I know that the problems that face us as caretakers of this planet are vast—sometimes too grim to contemplate. We all make choices every day and I know I do not always make the best ones. And yet I think the first step to solving some of these massive issues is to instill in our children a love of this amazing world we live in, to cultivate a sense of reverence for the nature that is all around us.

Teaching children to appreciate nature is really not necessary; they already love it, wonder at it, learn from it. Children love animals, rocks, sticks, butterflies, flowers. Children need to splash in puddles, dig in the earth, and run their hands across the bark of a tree. They do this without our prompting, as long as we allow them to, discovering all along, unearthing small mysteries and miracles every day.

There is a wealth of children’s books about the earth. More are being published every day and your local bookstore or online retailer is sure to have a display or special on such books in honor of Earth Day. Some have a clear, scientific slant and some have a cute, cuddly animal slant. Honestly, there are so many that no single family could possibly explore them all!

What is a trifle harder to find are books with a reverent stance, that are poetic or provide a global ecological stance without being ALARMING. Here are a few we enjoy:

Clockwise:

Frank Ash’s The Earth and I — A simple, rainbow-hued story of a boy who loves the earth and cares for her; perfect for preschoolers.

Graeme Base’s Uno’s Garden — A story of people moving into an unspoiled Eden and ruining it, and then the gradual return of the marvelous creatures and plants that lived there. Eventually they achieve balance with nature. It is also a mathematics story. Asher loves the creatures and the challenge of finding the Snortlepig. Lucas likes the pictures and the math.

Nancy Luenn’s Mother Earth — A beautiful and poetic personifcation of the earth, with a message that we should enjoy all that the earth has to offer and give back to her, too. I found this at the library and then scoured the Internet to find a copy for our home. I think it may be out of print, but you can still find copies.

Linda Glaser’s Our Big Home: An Earth Poem — Illustrated by one of my favorite illustrators, Elisa Kleven, this book is intricate and stunning: “We all live here. People, ants, elephants, trees, lizards, lichen, turtles, bees. We all share the same big home.”

Tony Johnston’s The Whole Green World — Also illustrated by Kleven. A girl counts her many blessings: shoes, a dog, a stick, a sack of seeds, a watering can, the sun, birds, ladybugs and ants, breezes, cake, a book, the moon, flowers and trees.

From Mother Earth.

From Our Big Home: An Earth Poem.

Shari Halpern’s My River — A used bookstore find published by Scholastic. Perfect for little ones. It shows how the river belongs to all creatures equally.

Earthways: Simple Environmental Activities for Young Children — This book is a good investment and one I’m sure we’ll keep for many years.

Joseph Bruchac’s Between Earth & Sky: Legends of Native American Sacred Places — For slightly older kids, this book tells of earth legends from various native peoples. The oil painting illustrations are lovely.

Nature Crafts for Kids — This is where I first saw the Easter eggs with the negative prints of leaves and flowers. Make a barometer, a birdbath, pressed flowers, candied violets, a sundial, baskets, evergreen garlands, and much more. Another keeper.

If you like what you see here and choose to purchase one of these books for your family, click the links here—my family will be supported just a tad by your purchase.

What’s in your Earth Day book basket?

We spent Saturday doing garden chores, and the weather was so mild and perfect, I didn’t mind a bit! Honestly, gardening in April is the BEST because it’s not yet too hot.

We pruned wisteria vines from out of our redwood tree, where they like to rove. We also planted new plants and trimmed trees and Ian reset our slate walkway. (It is still drying and looks like a sticky, muddy mess right now, but soon the stones will be revealed and we’ll plant some kind of creepy, crawly turf to grow between them.) I potted some plants and dug up a few daylilies to propagate them. I’ve never done that before, so I’m hoping that the five new clumps I planted elsewhere in the yard take off. If this works, then I have many more daylilies to separate.

Slowly, slowly the bare spots in the yard are filling in with new lovelies. Last year’s plants are bigger—the ones that survived our freakish snow from last December. It is one of my several obsessions: What will go here? What could I grow there? I’m thinking of adding something with purple flowers here. Is there any yellow over there? No? Better add some.

And my patient Ian smiles, pulls out the tools, and gets to work. Best of all, he said, “I’m really proud of our yard.”

One of our six new azaleas.

Nasturtium seedlings. I’m hoping these will become a riotous tangle of red, orange, yellow, and green.

My purple robe locust tress are in full bloom and the hummingbirds and bees are mad for them. They smell divine. One of these tress is now about 30 feet tall.

New patio pots with petunias, gazania, and bacopa.

My soft lamb’s ears. I love to pet them.

Inspired by SouleMama {this moment} – A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.