“Becoming a parent may happen on purpose or by accident, but however it comes about, parenting itself is a calling. It calls us to recreate our world every day, to meet if freshly in every moment. Such a calling is in actuality nothing less than a rigorous spiritual discipline—a quest to realize our truest, deepest nature as a human being. The very fact that we are a parent is continually asking us to find and express what is most nourishing, most loving, most wise and caring in ourselves, to be, as much as we can, our best selves.”

—Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn, from Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting

Usually, when Lucas is dropped off in the morning, he jumps into the thick of things right away. Very often Ian takes him to school. Today was a Parent Tea day, though, so I took him and stayed with him in his classroom for about a half hour. All the other parents were there, too.

Lucas proudly displayed two projects he’s been working on lately: a small, decorated gourd shaker that he confidently pulled out of a basket of 23 other gourd shakers. Sure enough, his name was written on it! He also showed me his Indian crown that he sewed from felt and beads. It has two lovely feathers in it, too—blue and red. I asked him if he made it himself and he proudly said yes, he even sewed on the beads. It was cool!

For circle time, we got to hear a few of the Indian/Thanksgiving songs (very cute!) that they’ve been learning. At first, Lucas participated with gusto, but as the circle of children danced hand-in-hand and he moved farther away from me to a position across the room, I saw him become somber and stop singing and doing the hand motions. When the teachers dismissed the parents for the day, he came to me in tears and said, “I want to stay with you!” We don’t often see displays of separation anxiety from him anymore, which is due partly to his age and partly to the exciting and fun nature of the activities he does without us. Somehow, my being with him in his classroom for a short time was enough to throw him off his normally self-assured and independent nature.

He was tearful when I passed him to his teacher and said goodbye, assuring him that I would be back at 12:30 to pick him up today. I had been kind of dreading this afternoon because he will be home and I have lots of work to do. It’s difficult to get any work done with him at home. But now, I feel happy that we’ll be able to spend the rest of the day together. My independent little guy still needs me sometimes.

“This fighter is another of Mama-san’s punk dolls. She’s quite pretty if you like girls who sword fight in spiked chokers, short skirts, and pigtails.”

And I say, who doesn’t?

So, the rest of the world may be going to hell in a handbasket, but for the moment in my little corner of Fair Oaks, things are pretty rosy. It’s currently 80 degrees F, and slanting golden sunlight is filtering through golden leaves everywhere I look.

Lucas and I just spent an hour playing at a little creek by his school. We walked there from the school parking lot and found a lovely spot at the creek. It’s shallow—no more than 4 inches deep—and the creek bottom is completely sandy with no rocks, sticks, or other pokey things. The creek is about 6 feet wide at this spot and he can roam about 30 feet and I can still see him. Lucas spent his hour in his underwear splashing, dancing, and building a dam with sticks. He raced leaves floating downstream (fairy boats). We had no arguments when it was time to go and he tromped both up- and downhill with little prodding and coaxing.

We’re definitely going back, weather permitting.

Today at the grocery store, the bagger boy helped bring my groceries to the car. On the way, he inquired, “What kind of baby are you having?”

I thought, A muskrat! But I replied, “A boy.”

“Oh, that’s great!” he said, as though that was the answer he was hoping for.

Whatever, I thought.

He put the groceries into the back of my car while I buckled Lucas into his carseat.

“Can I touch your baby?” Creepy Bag Boy asked, reaching out his creepy hand to touch me.

“No!”

“OK. No problem,” he said as he pushed the cart away.

Yes, it’s a problem! You creep! I thought. People are fucking weird.

Anybody ever done any silk dying or painting? I want to learn how to do it. I found a lot of info on this site: http://www.dharmatrading.com/silkpainting/dyes-vs-paints.html

But when it comes to learning stuff like this, I learn so much better by watching/assisting someone or at least muddling through with another beginner by my side.

Silk scarves have become an important plaything around here (a la Waldorf). They are wonderful and infinitely useful. Unfortunately, they’re rather expensive, particularly the plant-dyed ones, which come in more natural colors.

Anybody game to try it with me?

Today was a stay-at-home-and-get-some-stuff-done day. We raked leaves and pine needles. Ian cleaned and repaired the rain gutters. We planted some “brown and bumpy” bulbs (some, or even most, of which may not grow because they were purchased last fall, not this fall). I edited three crummy chapters of a crummy book. Lucas helped me make muffins in the morning and I made meatloaf and sauteed zucchini for dinner (with an extra meatloaf to freeze for another evening’s meal).

We are greatly enjoying a bounty of pomegranates, some of which were given to us by Lucas’s former teacher and some of which came from our dear Bs. (Thank you, Bs!) They are huge, rosy, and fat, bursting with thousands of sweet ruby gems. We have one for dessert every night. Lucas thinks they’re the best food ever: Food of the Gods, even.

I have been blessed lately to hear more often, “Mommy, you’re the sweetest, most beautiful, most kindest, nicest mommy in the whole world” than “Mommy, you’re mean. You’re a mean mommy! I hate you!” In the early morning, when Lucas pads into our bedroom to join us in bed for a snuggle, he tells me I’m the best mom in the world. And it’s wonderful! I endeavor to hold it in the front of my brain all day long like an anchor keeping me to my purpose despite being tossed about by our current moods and stresses.

Today, Lucas decided that his dad is the best daddy in the whole world and told Ian so. I think it was the first time Ian ever received such superlative praise from Lucas. It made Ian feel great, I think, and thus is worth writing about. They worked hard together today, with tools and in the garage. A bonding day.

The Halloween Fairy took the candy to the Sugar Sprite earlier this week so she can feed her Sugar Babies. Lucas was pleased to help the babies get enough food and cheerfully traded his (rather small) stash of candy for the pretty gnomes the Fairy left him. We’ve been building gnome homes and decorating them with rocks and crystals. The gnome “play set” is quite elaborate. We also have discovered that beeswax sculpting produces easy and serviceable gnomes. The more we play with that stuff, the more I’m convinced it’s the most perfect toy ever created—as long as you have a daddy with warm hands around to soften up the wax a little.

I picked up my knitting again last night. I’m about 3/4 of the way done with a scarf I started last winter and never completed. I think I may finish it soon. Creative pursuits are good for my spirit right now, I think. I’m trying to come up with a Christmas craft that I can make by the dozens to give as gifts this year. The challenge is, whatever it is has to be made for under $2 a piece.

On Friday I went to coffee with my mother and dangled a whole new knitting challenge in front of her: wool diaper soakers. They’re worn (by babies) over cloth diapers like the dreaded “plastic pants” but they’re soft, washed in lanolin and therefore are nearly waterproof and have mysterious antibacterial properties. They’re all the rage in the Natural Parenting circles, so of course, I must have some! Mom is cranking out socks like there’s no tomorrow. Lucas now has a drawerful of gorgeous handmade socks.

The Wilsons on September 30, 2206 at Camp TietheKnot.

Yesterday’s Halloween festivities were great fun.

Once again, we attended the Sac. Waldorf School Pumpkin Path and dutifully followed our Angel Guide through a maze of amazing, interactive plays and stories. We saw the King and Queen, a Japanese folktale about separated lovers who are allowed to cross a rainbow bridge to be with each other one night per year, Johnny Appleseed, Peter Rabbit in Mr. MacGregor’s garden, mermaids under the sea, a circus with some truly fine performances including a ballerina and a dancing bear, an acrobat, a fire spinner, and clowns, Native Americans chanting, cowboys on the range, Rumplestiltskin, gnomes underground making items from ore, a baker with a squirrel problem, Robin Hood, and probably others that I’m forgetting at the moment. After each play, the children were presented with a small gift or goodie to eat.

Lucas has been excited about Halloween for about a month now, and he picked out a great little robot costume to wear for the big day. But yesterday when getting dressed to go to Ian’s work Halloween party, he kind of flipped out about the robot costume and refused to wear it. It wasn’t entirely clear why, but he shouted “Take it off!” at grandma.

So, at the last minute, he decided that he’d rather be a cowboy for Halloween than a robot. Fortunately, we were well supplied with appropriate western wear for our little cowboy.

Here’s a picture:

Today, Lucas turns four-and-a-half!

Here’s what the Halloween Fairy is bringing Lucas in exchange for candy.

Have your child place extra Halloween treats in a basket on the doorstep. The Halloween Fairy will come and take the candy away. She gives it to the Sugar Sprite to use to feed her many Sugar Babies. The Sugar Sprite collects nectar from flowers to feed her babies during the warmer months of the year, but as winter approaches she needs your help to feed her family. In exchange for your child’s generosity, the Halloween Fairy and Sugar Sprite will leave a small gift for your child to play with.